Highlander: Duende

Duncan: "I'm better now."
Richie: "Yeah. But maybe he is, too."

Lousy episode. Incredible duel.

Highlander: The Ransom of Richard Redstone

Richie: "It was a fake. All of it. Even the tux was rented."

This pseudo James Bond-ian adventure has always been my favorite Richie-centric episode. There was nothing particularly profound about it -- it was just a fun change of pace. Richie got kidnapped and tied up several times, we had a French damsel in distress facing a fate worse than death, there was a chateau, a Ferrari, a casino heist, what's not to like? Of course, even though the situation was more adult, Duncan still had to get Richie out of trouble. What's a father to do?

Highlander: The Valkyrie

Interpol guy: "Old friends are the worst. They claim more of your soul."

The last two were about religion. Time for one about politics, I guess.

Highlander: The Messenger

Richie: "I'm talking about a chance to change our lives forever, to live without being afraid."
Duncan: "What, without a head?"

This one was fun. And it was the second episode in a row with a quasi-religious theme. At least the immortal in question was a lot more like Jesus than Larca was. Except we never did learn what the fake Methos was up to. Was he sincere or deluded? The immortal equivalent of a mental patient who thought he was Napoleon? Or was he a poor swordsman who was cleverly reducing the immortal population by guile?

Highlander: Little Tin God

Larca: "They choose to worship me. And in return, they are cared for. Is that not a god's covenant with his chosen?"
Duncan: "I think you've been in the jungle too long."

An immortal with a serious Jesus complex. It's only surprising there aren't more of them out there.

Highlander: Haunted

Jennifer: "You killed my husband and you made love to me. You sick son of a bitch."

It was a dark and stormy night, and beautiful widow Jennifer Hill was being haunted by her dead husband, Alec. It felt like the beginning of a bad gothic mystery movie. Actually, that pretty much describes the episode. It wasn't really all that bad, but it wasn't all that good, either.

Highlander: Money No Object

Duncan: "Are you nuts? How many times did you get shot?"
Cory: "More than Bonnie, less than Clyde. What's the difference?"

I started watching Highlander near the end of its run; this was the first episode I ever saw. It hooked me, too. There is something unusual and really, really fun about immortals full of joie de vivre on a spree, dying and getting dug up, over and over again. It just wasn't something I'd seen a lot on television.

Highlander: Dramatic License

Carolyn: "He'd been with princesses and queens. He was going to live forever. And me? I'm just going to get old and fat. And I'll always be from Newark."

I've always loved this one. Duncan MacLeod, heroic immortal warrior, incredibly handsome -- he practically is the hero of an historical romance. And the story segued beautifully into actual romance, without getting the slightest bit mushy.

Highlander: Glory Days

Joe: "She's married. Got this nice family. Thirty years later, she's still in love with me."
Duncan: "I guess it must be the beard."

This one started out looking like the standard "Duncan has to take out an evil immortal" plot. But it ended up a lot better than I expected.

Highlander: Manhunt

Carl: "The man thinks he's a piece of garbage, but he's not. Nobody's garbage."

So the moral of the story is, fame and immortality just don't mix.

Highlander: The End of Innocence

Richie: "I am sick and tired of being called a kid."

So Richie returned after an extremely lengthy absence, with a lot less hair and a problem with nightmares. And he reacted to his fear of Dark Quickening Duncan by picking fights with other immortals. Clearly, Duncan stayed in Paris a little too long.

Highlander: Prophecy

Young Duncan: "You will win because you're good. And good always wins over evil."

Leaving aside the fact that I don't like magic on Highlander, Tracy Scoggins' affected British accent has always made me cringe, and you just know throughout that the answer to defeating Kantos would be earplugs, this wasn't such a bad episode. But prophecy, shmophecy. It didn't make sense that it would take four hundred years and a special prophecy for Duncan to take out yet another bad immortal.

Highlander: One Minute to Midnight

Methos: "Watchers, afraid they're going to be killed by immortals, holed up in a funeral home. Is it just me, or is there some cosmic irony in that?"
Joe: "I think it's just you."

I don't know. I thought it was ironic.

Highlander: Judgment Day

Joe: "I'm going to blow my brains out tomorrow. Tradition. You gotta love it."

Clip show.

Highlander: Till Death

Robert: "Just give me a jab. Not too deep."
Methos: "Where's your sense of drama?"

As John Barrymore was rumored to have said when he was dying, "Dying is easy. Comedy is hard." Highlander, best known for adventure and drama, managed to pull out some truly wonderful comic episodes in its last three seasons. This has always been one of my favorites.

Highlander: Double Jeopardy

Duncan: "There's a difference between hate and fear. I hated Xavier. You're just a cheap imitation."

So of course, Xavier St. Cloud would have a homicidal immortal student out there.

Highlander: Through a Glass Darkly

Methos: "So lure him outside and take his head. Problem solved."
Duncan: "I never know when you're kidding."
Methos: "Part of my charm."

See, I can sort of see where they were going with this one. Unfortunately, they didn't quite get there.

Highlander: The Immortal Cimoli

Case: "I've come to take your head."
Cimoli: "I'm still using it right now."

What if you're a brand new immortal and you don't have a kindly, seasoned immortal waiting in the wings to tell you the score and show you the ropes? Maybe if you were also a frustrated, unemployed magician and immortality made you a headliner, it would seem miraculous, like an answer to a prayer.

Highlander: Methuselah's Gift

Duncan: "Don't lose your head over a fairy tale."
Amanda: "It's my head."

Amanda and Methos bonded. And over a stupid crystal.

Highlander: Promises

Duncan: "That's Paris. Never a dull moment."

I love Highlander, but it was so hit and miss. This one was pretty much a miss.

Highlander: Deliverance

Joe: "Maybe you should just stay away, because he will kill you if he can."
Methos: "I'm tougher than I look."

Yes, this episode was fabulous; it absolutely worked, and I loved it. But I've always thought it was hilarious that Duncan was essentially cured of his dark quickening by cutting off the head of a psychiatrist.

Highlander: Something Wicked

Richie: "Whatever happened, Mac, we can work it out."
Duncan: "Sorry, wrong number."

Jim Coltec considered it his spiritual job to absorb evil, so he spent his immortal life taking out those nasty immortal serial killers. Unfortunately, it caught up with him. And when Duncan was forced to take Coltec's head, it subsequently caught up with Duncan.

Highlander: The Blitz

Diane: "I guess none of this would be important if it wasn't our last day on earth."

Maybe it's the romantic in me, but I've always loved this one. And I'm talking specifically about the exceptional flashback story, which was more than half the episode.

Highlander: Timeless

Joe: "Maybe when the candle burns for a shorter time, it burns brighter."

Finally, the obvious question. If someone is destined to become an immortal, why wait for their "time"? Why not get it over with? I know that if I could live for centuries, I'd much rather do it in the body of a twenty-five year old. And isn't it much easier to master a sword when you're younger?

Highlander: Chivalry

Richie: "We have this thing between us, Mac. It's like an electrical connection. Why can't you understand that?"
Methos: "They didn't have electricity when he knew her."

This episode has always intrigued me.

Highlander: The Wrath of Kali

Kamir: "The great wheel turns, and the goddess takes her revenge."
Duncan: "Maybe you helped her out."

Again with the standard plot, and it certainly could have been a lot better. Maybe this one should have aired back in season one.

Highlander: Reluctant Heroes

Duncan: "I don't want to put him away. I want to bury him."

Again with the standard rubber stamp Highlander plot: an evil immortal that Duncan once knew showed up, still killing people, so Duncan had to take him out. This was the basic plot of most of the movies, too, and I won't deny that I got tired of it.

Highlander: The Colonel

Amanda: "Did the other guy have a bigger sword or something?"
Duncan: "Don't worry about it. It's just an old war wound acting up."

Immortal grudges are a real bitch.

Highlander: Reunion

Kenny: "But I'm just a boy."
Amanda: "Like hell."

I wasn't wild about the first Kenny episode. This one was a lot better. Probably because it was less about Kenny, and more about Amanda.

Highlander: Double Eagle

Duncan: "Can't we just discuss this like reasonable people?"
Amanda and Kit: (together) "No!"

Was this the first episode that was just funny, beginning to end?

Highlander: Leader of the Pack

Richie: "If you ask me, I think he's taking this zen crap a little too far."

Immortals with pets. Who knew? And those evil immortal serial killers wouldn't just settle for a nice, fluffy pussycat. If I were an immortal, I'd have cats. And I'd live on holy ground. I'm such a wuss.

Highlander: The Innocent

Richie: "When you find somebody who's helpless, you gotta protect him. Right?"

No doubt about it, Duncan raised Richie right.

Highlander: Brothers in Arms

Joe: "I owe you my life. Not his."

All about Joe. How he lost his legs in Vietnam, how becoming a Watcher gave him reason to live. And about the immortal who saved his life.

Highlander: Homeland

Rachel: "Let me guess. You're here to find your highland roots."
Duncan: "I didn't know I'd lost them."

Yes, the Scottish scenery and mournful music were first class, and strongly reminiscent of the original Highlander movie. Yes, we got a major backstory on Duncan. But I've never been wild about this episode.

Highlander: Finale (2)

Kalas: "Tell him he meets me tonight, or we're all on CNN."

This was Highlander at its best.

Highlander: Finale (1)

Methos: "Well, life as we know it is over."

This was one of my favorite two parters.

Highlander: Reasonable Doubt

Kagan: "This is an execution. I never had a chance."

A good attempt at a fairly serious plot. We could feel sorry for both Kagan and Simone. At least, right up until the moment when he killed her.

Highlander: Mortal Sins

Duncan: "Fifty years ago, Daimler was a murderer. If he still is, I have to stop him."
Anne: "Why? Is it your job?"

This was a mortal story, as opposed to an immortal story. More accurately, about the problem of running into someone you knew fifty years ago, and still looking the same. I guess it's an occupational hazard for immortals who insist on hanging out in Paris instead of carefully changing continents every twenty years.

Highlander: Testimony

Anne: "I've tried it with you, I've tried it without you. And I'll take it with you, any day."

So we had the standard Highlander plot: an evil immortal that Duncan met once before blew into town and wreaked havoc until he was stopped.

Highlander: Take Back the Night

Ceirdwyn: "More blood does not make it better. Never will."

The point of this episode was that, even though mortal lovers die too soon, love is always worth it. The immortal Ceirdwyn (interesting name, cool face tatts), old friend and former lover of Duncan's, thought her fifteen years with Steven were worth the pain. Duncan took her advice, and now Anne is on her way to Paris. That could be interesting, although it probably would be more interesting if I liked Anne. Where's Amanda these days? And what about the whole "I couldn't handle another Tessa" issue?

Highlander: Methos

Duncan: "Have you..."
Methos: "Made any sense of it? Found any purpose?"
Duncan: "You read minds, too?"
Methos: "No. It's what I'd ask if I'd just met me."

I have a confession to make. I've fantasized about Methos on and off for years. There's something about the combination of the actor and the character that was magical. Methos is one of the chief reasons why I wanted to review this series.

Highlander: Star-Crossed

Fitz: "I just want you to be as happy as I am."
Duncan: "Nobody could be as happy as you are."

Although we met him briefly once before, this episode gave us much more of the wonderful Hugh Fitzcairn, played by rock star Roger Daltry.

Highlander: Song of the Executioner

Paul: "That is Brother Kalas. I'm afraid warmth is not his greatest quality."

This episode introduced the diabolical Kalas, one of the best villains they ever had on this series. I mean, really. Killing Anne's patients and framing her for it? Planting drugs in Joe's bar and tipping off the cops? Beheading a praying monk? That's about as evil as it gets.

Highlander: Blind Faith

Joe: "I don't see how twenty years of doing good deeds begins to cover his tab."

The immortal Kage went from extreme viciousness and the worship of money to a selfless, religious life helping others. But he managed to remain unlikeable and uninteresting, anyway.

Highlander: They Also Serve

Joe: "Everyone tends to root for their guy a little. It's an occupational hazard."

Watchers get attached to their immortals. Of course they do.

Highlander: Vendetta

Benny: "My name's Benny Carbassa. You looking for me?"
Duncan: "No. You're not my type."

Benny was a petty crook and immortal loser who couldn't seem to stop getting into trouble. And getting his friends in trouble. Have you ever noticed that episodes featuring characters like Benny almost never work on series television? Why did Duncan even bother putting up with this guy?

Highlander: Blackmail

Joe: "What exactly did this guy see?"
Duncan: "Let's just say it's not something I want on the six o'clock news."

This was a fun and fast paced episode, with a strange combination of elements. A beheading caught on camera. Blackmail, with a Strangers on a Train twist. Two evil immortals as partners. Hide and seek with swords in a huge maze, which is not something you see every day.

Highlander: Shadows

Joe: "All the crap you guys go through, I'm surprised you're not all nuts."

There's something really horrible about the idea of an immortal burning at the stake. No wonder Garrick went insane. (Although he didn't seem tightly wired beforehand, either.) I kept wondering throughout how Garrick was making Duncan hallucinate, and I wasn't satisfied with the mystical answer. I would have preferred drugs or hypnosis.

Highlander: Obsession

David: "What'd she look like?"
Richie: "In her twenties, brunette, really cute, scared to death. Sound familiar?"

All about a nice, immortal furniture maker... super needy stalker guy.

Highlander: The Lamb

Anne: "I know he's your family and everything, but didn't you once feel like just smacking him one? I can't believe I said that. Did I just say that?"

What would happen to an immortal who died for the first time as a child? Intriguing idea.