Dexter: The Angel of Death


Dexter: "I understand the urge to end someone's life, but what is this fascination with ending the world?"

Several readers mentioned in the comments section last week that Travis was acting alone and hallucinating the existence of Professor Gellar. (I hadn't thought of that at all. It's probably obvious that I don't read other people's reviews.) Interestingly, nothing in this episode contradicted this theory. And if it's true, Dexter just let a serial killer go free to kill again. (I was saying no, Dexter! Don't let him go!)

Community: Horror Fiction in Seven Spooky Steps

“Trick-or-Dean!”

Imagine, for your entertainment, the concept of a door. You try to unlock it with a key of imagination but someone has changed the locks since the divorce so you kick it open instead, hurting your foot in the process. You limp through and beyond is another dimension: a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind, a dimension where the lights flicker all week because the Dean can't afford to get someone in to fix them. You're moving into a land of both time-travelling policemen and illiterate vampires, of horror movie references and surreal humour; you've just crossed over into... The Twilight Zone The Community Halloween Special!!!!

Ringer: She's Ruining Everything

"What the hell am I doing?"

Judging by episode two, the main thrust of Ringer will be Bridget slowly attempting to fix the lives of people that Siobhan presumably took for granted. And she's got a pretty big rap-sheet so far: She cheats on her husband, who seems like a great guy who at one point truly loved his wife. She betrays her best friend, who's clearly vulnerable and erratic. And she seemingly trashes her catty stepdaughter at every opportunity, instead of offering the guidance and support that she appears to be crying out for. Bridget improved as a character here, too. She's still frustratingly vacant at points, but I like that she decided to stick around and try and make a positive difference. There was no way that wasn't going to happen, but whatever.

All that and BRAIIINsss too: A Few Thoughts About Zombies


"Zombies are the new vampires, didn't you know that?"
- Arlene, True Blood

I have been thinking about Zombies a lot lately... a whole lot, almost a bit obsessively. Let me be clear, I am not too concerned about the dead rising tomorrow, but the dead sure have been shambling around here quite a bit lately, and I am not altogether unconcerned.

*warning, all sorts of spoilers for stuff ahead, here's a hint, the dead start walking around*


The Rise of the Dead
(see, the heading alone gives it away)


Okay, so Zombies are scary and creepy, but so what, so are corporate executives (with apologies to zombies for the comparison). How did they become the monster of our times? I think it's because they are the perfect monster for an industrial and internet world. They are about the force of a billion or so things working against you. They don't care about you but are perfectly willing to destroy you all the same. Contrast them with vampires (which they would have been indistinguishable from 150 years ago). The thing is that vampirism is tempting in a transgressive sort of way, and the victims are in many (maybe most) cases seen as at least partially complicit.


Lucy is not a random victim, attacked by mere accident, you understand? No. She is a willing recruit, a breathless follower, a wanton follower. I dare say, a devoted disciple. She is the Devil's concubine! - Van Helsing, Bram Stoker's Dracula

There aren't any (or not many) willing recruits to the ranks of the zombies. Consider this quote from Zombieland about a victim:

In those moments where you're not quite sure if the undead are really dead, dead, don't get all stingy with your bullets. I mean, one more clean shot to the head, and this lady could have avoided becoming a human Happy Meal. Woulda... coulda... shoulda.

If our monsters reflect our fears, zombies are about being packed into cities with millions of others and trying to figure out why bad things are happening to us. Here are some great zombie movies, books, series, stories which could form a primer for understanding the modern dead. They can be divided into three groups: old school zombies, modern dread and the new normal, with just maybe a new phase out on the horizon.

Old school zombies begin and end with George Romero. He's still out there making his zombie movies today. He sets the tone and it's fair to say that if you make a zombie movie today, the assumption is that you are working with "Romero rules" (slow moving, human munching, dispatched with a shot to the head) until proven otherwise.

Night of the Living Dead (1968)
"It has been established that persons who have recently died have been returning to life and committing acts of murder. A widespread investigation of funeral homes, morgues, and hospitals has concluded that the unburied dead have been returning to life and seeking human victims. It's hard for us here to be reporting this to you, but it does seem to be a fact."

The modern zombie era begins in a cemetery in Pennsylvania in 1968. It's not even immediately obvious that there is a problem until the foolish characters in that lonely graveyard start to suggest that the shambling figure in the distance is coming. Coming for them! And they have been coming for us ever since. It established the rules, the relentlessness and the hopelessness which has been the hallmark of all subsequent zombie tales.

Dawn of the Dead (1978)
"This isn't the Republicans versus the Democrats, where we're in a hole economically or... or we're in another war. This is more crucial than that. This is down to the line, folks, this is down to the line. There can be no more divisions among the living!"

I personally have always found this movie, the original zombie mall-crawl, a bit pedantic and overrated, but I am in the very small minority with that opinion. Generally viewed as the best zombie movie ever made, it realized George Romero's vision of the zombie plague as social commentary about a society that deserves to get eaten by zombies.

Romero keeps making his zombie movies but sadly they seem, well, a little lifeless anymore. The nihilism of the past has softened a bit, but the didactic social commentary just keeps getting stronger. There are still some great moments (the death of the villain in Land of the Dead at the hands of a gas station attendant zombie comes to mind) but the times have passed Romero by.

It only gets Worse

Modern dread is starker than the Romero vision. Its about the pervasive (and likely accurate) sense of doom that hangs over society in the 21st century. SARS, Katrina, terrorism, even the economy and joblessness seem beyond our control and ultimately the best we can hope for is to save ourselves, and maybe our friends and family. It is a post-apocalyptic vision in the middle of daily lives. Two movies capture this pervasive dread perfectly:

28 Days Later (2002)
He was full of plans. Have you got any plans, Jim? Do you want us to find a cure and save the world or just fall in love and fuck? Plans are pointless. Staying alive's as good as it gets.

Beyond the fact that it has the best introduction to the end of the world ever (which The Walking Dead shamelessly cribs from), what really makes this a masterpiece is the cause of the zombie-apocalypse. Its uncontrolled rage brought on by our own stupidity. This metaphor gets at a big part of what makes the 21st century zombie movie, because it focuses not on moral failings per se but on the overwhelming nature of the problem. There is definitely social commentary, but it's mostly about small people swept away by disaster.

Dawn of the Dead (2004)
How do you think your God will judge you? Well friends, now we know. When there is no more room in hell, the dead will walk the earth.

Actually in this version, they sprint the earth, but that's a minor point. This is easily the most underrated zombie movie of recent years. It had the dubious "advantage" of being compared to the original, but there's a particularly good quote in both that illustrate how things have changed.

1978 version:

What are they doing? Why do they come here?

Stephen: Some kind of instinct. Memory, of what they used to do. This was an important place in their lives.


2004 version:

Why are they coming here?

Kenneth: Memory, maybe. Instinct. Maybe they're coming for us.

The difference is subtle. In 1978, they are still coming to the mall because that's what the soulless continue to do even after death. Trust me; in 2004 they are coming for us.

Finally, I can't leave this version without mentioning the opening credits set to Johnny Cash's "The Man Comes Around." If you haven't seen it, you are truly missing a masterpiece of creepiness.



Traffic, Job Loss, and Zombies

But then something strange happened to this sense of overwhelming dread that pervaded zombie movies, old and new, in the early 21st century. Zombies wove their ways into our lives and essentially became part of the "New Normal."

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
"He really believed, that were it not for the inferiority of her connections, he should be in some danger of falling in love, and were it not for his considerable skill in the deadly arts, that he should be in danger of being bested by hers--for never had he seen a lady more gifted in the ways of vanquishing the undead."

Many would dismiss this book (and soon to be movie) as silly gimmickry, but I think it represents the total ubiquity of the dead in our lives. The book weaves together the Jane Austen classic with a tale of zombie attack (and also ninjas, but that's a different essay altogether). It makes the point, perhaps accidentally, that zombies (or the existential threat they represent) can safely be present in virtually any story. My only real complaint is: not enough zombies!

Shaun of the Dead
Just look at the face: it's vacant, with a hint of sadness. Like a drunk who's lost a bet.

Funniest zombie movie ever, and that in a terribly over parodied genre, because they actually play a lot of it relatively straight much of the time. Basically, the zombie apocalypse is really inconvenient in large measure because it forces them to confront the problems they have with their relationships, although they still do manage to get down to the pub. At the end of the day though, becoming a zombie doesn't really interfere with one character's lifestyle that much; he's back in the shed playing video games and being a slacker. Zombies have become just another annoyance in our lives.

Zombieland
Oh, America. I wish I could tell you that this was still America, but I've come to realize that you can't have a country without people. And there are no people here. No, my friends. This is now the United States of Zombieland. - Columbus

Oh, I do it to blend in. You know. Zombies don't mess with other zombies. Buddy of mine, makeup guy, he showed me how to do this. Corn starch. You know, some berries, a little licorice for the ladies. Suits my lifestyle, you know. I like to get out and do stuff. Just played nine holes on the Riviera. Just walked on. Nobody there. – Bill Murray as Bill Murray


The "Scream" of zombie movies which manages to articulate the "Romero rules" as immutable laws of the universe. Witty and again focused on the relationships and travails of daily life, the characters sail along with their lives even as the majority of the population tries to eat them. The focus isn't the end of the world, it's the quest for the last Twinkie or trying to get laid in a world with only two women left. Zombies are just another fact of life.

The Walking Dead
I'm sorry this happened to you.

We have never had a closer relationship with the dead than we do in The Walking Dead. The mutilated zombie woman who Rick speaks the above quote to, or the poor man who is trapped and unable to kill his wife (now a zombie) even as she returns again and again to her home make great examples. But they pale beside the best scene in the entire series to date in which Andrea waits for her sister Amy to rise from the dead so she can say goodbye and kill her. It is these scenes about their connections and not the zombie fighting scenes that make this show harrowing to watch. This show isn't funny by a long sight but it also accepts the zombie as just the way it is. We care about the dead, but have to get on with our lives. The world is a horrible place, but the world is the world we live in, and it's time to get on with it. Everyone I have spoken with about The Walking Dead has had the same objection to a Zombie TV show, "won't it get boring just running from Zombies every week?" The genius of this show is it's not about zombies, it's about living in a world of constant, unremitting danger. A world which we sometimes fear may be our own.

The next great vision

So overall, a pretty depressing genre, but I think there is an interesting new trend that may be developing. Just as we have seen characters learning to live with the New Normal of zombie wasteland, there have begun to appear zombie stories about facing down this greatest threat to human existence and actually doing something about it.

World War Z
"... 'the greatest threat to human existence.' C'mon! Can you imagine what America would have been like if the federal government slammed on the brakes every time some paranoid crackpot cried "wolf" or "global warming" or "living dead"? Please."

This book, published in 2006, is a compelling and readable oral history of the Zombie War. Brad Pitt is off making it into a movie as I write this, and there's a reason he is. It's about a zombie apocalypse that humans fight their way back from. It's on the theme that even the worst problem that has ever existed can be overcome. That there may be a new normal, but it can be one defined by human courage and ingenuity and not by zombie appetite.

Sadly, the very hopefulness of this vision may be the double tap to the head of the genre. Things may be bad but they are not irredeemable, and I suspect this will force us to find a new big bad. (Werewolves anyone?)

Doctor Who: The Time Monster

"Nobody and nothing can stop me now!"

There's something very Russell T Davies about this season finale. Like many of RTD's season finales, 'The Time Monster' is an epic story that sees the Doctor and his surrogate family working together to stop a recurring enemy from conquering the universe or something. And like so many of Russell's epic finales, it's an overblown mess of a story, remembered more for the emotional scenes between the Doctor and his companion than for anything else.

Person of Interest: Judgment

“You have two questions right now: Who are you and where is my son? Which one do you want to focus on?”

Kidnapping cases on TV are tricky. On the one hand, they’re really easy to relate to, because everybody is afraid of losing the ones they love and it plays on our paranoia, which is something Person of Interest does well; on the other hand, everybody knows they’re not going to kill the kidnappee, especially if it’s a kid, so it may become very predictable. As this one was.

Supernatural: Slash Fiction


Frank: "Well, I'll be darned. Psycho Butch and Sundance. You're on CNN right now."

Was that a record number of beheadings in a single television episode? I don't remember ever seeing that many, even in an episode of Highlander.

Star Trek: And the Children Shall Lead


Spock: "Without followers, evil cannot spread."

Apparently, lawyers are evil aliens plotting to kill us all. Or maybe this episode was a morality tale about respecting your parents and doing your homework, and the evils of ice cream and ring-around-the-rosy.

In Time


[Say hello to J.D. Balthazar, who will be reviewing movies for us! Welcome to the site, J.D. -- Billie]

In Time is a slick, bright, and fast paced sci-fi action movie directed by Andrew Niccol of Gattaca fame. It falls into the dystopian future sub-section of Sci-fi, and uses a sort of Bonnie and Clyde meets Robin Hood framework. It is set in the near future, with a look that draws from different eras of clothing and style. This creates a solid atmosphere that isn't gritty like most of the other movies of this genre. This cleaned up style is reminiscent of a Michael Bay movie, but it manages to not lose the integrity of being a hard science fiction story. It asks hard questions of its viewers, and has an extremely relevant message of corporate and governmental corruption.

The background is semi-typical for this genre, but no less interesting. Through the perfection of genetic engineering, everyone is born with a life span of exactly twenty-six years. A second past your twenty fifth birthday, your final year begins to count down and you stop aging. This time is measured on an organic digital display embedded on your left forearm that everyone is born with. Where it gets interesting is how this time can be traded, with a simple, nearly instantaneous handshake. Because of this startlingly cruel technology, all forms of currency are now based on numerical values that literally represent life. With everyone perpetually young, there is no indicator of age. You keep living until your counter runs out, or you die a violent death. In a world of immortals, there is no real growth. This is where the real meat of the story hinges its drama on, the concept of endless stagnation. It is a remarkably high concept that was handled with a bit of a heavy hand. Yet it manages to not be preachy, while using transparent allegories of present day problems.

The cast was really solid. Justin Timberlake (Will Salas) is a serviceable lead who is both likeable and believable. Which might sound like I'm damning him with faint praise. But he has the thankless job of being the hero, which he does quite nicely, and I was pleasantly surprised how well he carried the emotional weight of the movie. Some of the plot elements that could be considered plot holes are filled in by some fascinating ideas of simple class barriers. The poor are used to running, and exerting themselves. The rich look pretty, but are so complacent and slow that they have become fairly fragile. Even our young heroine Sylvia Weis (Amanda Seyfried), who starts off as an emotionally abused rich girl, isn't as physically fast as our hero, so he ends up dragging her around for a good portion of the film. Cillian Murphy has a great part as the cop chasing them. His motivations and determination drive a lot of the tension of the story. Which could've easily turned into a long chase sequence, but thankfully didn't.

There is so much nuance to this movie. With so many neat tidbits, I find myself having trouble choosing a single thing to point out.


So here are some of my Favorite Details:

Cops are called Time Keepers

The countries and cities are separated into Zones which are blocked off with barriers that require time to pass through.

The wealthy district is called Greenwich.

The local Mission has a sign that says "Out of Time", and the "Out of" goes out when there are hand outs.

The guy working at the mission uses his own time to save people.

Dying is called Timing Out.

Being born into wealth is referred to as coming from Time.

The movie plays with the reverse of the old "Needs of the Many" dynamic. More than one character refers to this idea that to achieve immortality, the lives of the many must be sacrificed for the benefit of the few.

The local gang are called the Minutemen.

On a giant digital display of the world stock market, the changing of currency is represented with hour glass icons.


The problem with hard science fiction, is that it is difficult for a lot of people to understand. Wrapping this kind of story in accessible action and pretty faces softens its cerebral nature. The result? It isn't perfect, but it is definitely enjoyable.

I'd give it 3 out of 4 portable automatic teller machines filled with endless time.

Vampire Diaries: Ghost World


“We’ll choose between boyfriend ghost dramas.”

It’s oddly reassuring that this episode of VD is not perfect. This is not to say that it was terrible—rather, it was very, very good. It just lacked the frightening impact of the previous five episodes. That’s a good thing: it’s a reminder that even at its least-astonishing, this is still a fascinating high-tension show.

Grimm: Pilot


Nearly two hundred years ago, two brothers wrote down true tales of the monsters that walk among us. Visible only to the Grimm family, the monsters look human to the rest of us, so the true importance of the tales “written” by the Grimm brothers is known only to their descendants, each of whom receives the curse when an older relative dies. Portland detective Nick Burkhardt is the latest in this tradition to be cursed when his guardian aunt edges closer to death, and he is struggling to come to terms with his new power while juggling an appropriate work/life balance and—I’m sure—missing sunshine, since Portland looks horribly grim (and an awful lot like Vancouver).

American Horror Story: Halloween (1)

"It's just a feeling I get... darkness."

I think the biggest hurdle this show has to overcome relates to the Harmon's and the fact that they're still living in that goddamn house! I may be stupid for seeking some realism in a show about gay ghosts and Frankenstein babies, but it's so ridiculously silly that this family is still sticking around despite being assaulted and weirded out by literally everyone that stumbles into their lives every week. Characters exhibiting irrational and clueless behavior is a trope of the horror genre, but it sure is making the family at the center of this show so easy to point and laugh at.

The Walking Dead: Bloodletting


“Little girl goes missing, you look for her, its plain and simple.”

How much of our civilized selves can we hold onto? What can we give up? Or must we give up and still call ourselves human?

Ringer: Pilot

"You have the wrong girl!"

It's almost fitting that a show all about identity and duplicity has some of its own identity issues. Pilot episodes are rarely flawless, but I was a little surprised at how Ringer's series premiere was more than a little frayed around the edges. Whether they want to or not, the specter of Buffy the Vampire Slayer hangs over the show. Not so much in trying to keep up with that show's immediate impression, but in the character Sarah Michelle Gellar has chosen for her return to primetime. I was shocked that what seemed to be the main premise of this series wasn't as omnipresent as I had presumed. Bridget and Siobhan are only thinly sketched so far, and despite playing two roles, series creators Eric Charmelo and Nicole Snyder don't give Gellar a whole lot to work with.

Person of Interest: Cura Te Ipsum


Andrew: “You're a good man.”
Reese: “Good? I lost that part of myself a long time ago.”

What does it take to be “good”? What does it mean?

It’s often been said that Person of Interest feels like Ben and Sayid’s time as a team during Season 4 of Lost. In this episode, the comparisons between Reese and Sayid, especially their concern about not being a good person, were intensified in that last very tense scene, which gave us some food for thought about the nature of goodness.

Dexter: A Horse of a Different Color


Dexter: "I guess there are some things even daddies can't fix."

Again with a specific religious theme. This time, surrender to something greater than yourself.

Doctor Who: The Mutants

"Un people, un-doing un-things un-together."

Dealing with themes of imperialism, apartheid, environmental issues and evolution, 'The Mutants' is certainly a story with ambition. In more skilled hands it could’ve been something of merit, but in Bob Baker and Dave Martin’s hands 'The Mutants' ends up being a great big plodding mess.

Once Upon a Time: Pilot


Emma: “Just because you believe something, doesn’t make it true.”
Henry: “That’s exactly what makes it true.”

That’s it, kids. All those characters you’ve known ever since before you can even remember? Get ready to know them again. This show, or at least the pilot, has achieved perfect balance between familiarity and freshness. It’s hard to avoid using words like “fantastic” and “magical” to describe it, because, frankly, those would be cheesy puns. But dealing with fairy tales demands cheesiness, don’t you think?

Supernatural: Shut Up, Dr. Phil


Dean: "Another physically impossible death. You got any ideas?"
Sam: "Cirque de Soleil?"

A tiny beating heart in the center of a cupcake. That's not something you see every day.

Red Lightning by John Varley


[This is a book review of Red Lightning by John Varley, first published in 2006.]

It's twenty-some years after the events of Red Thunder, and the tourist industry on Mars has taken off. Manny and Kelly are running a hotel on Mars with their teenage children, daughter Elizabeth and son Ray, and this time, Ray is telling the first person story. Although it has many of the same characters, focuses on young people, and is set in the same universe, Red Lightning is a much different work than Red Thunder. In fact, it's almost like two novels slapped together. And unfortunately, it's not one of Varley's strongest works.


In part one, the Garcia-Stricklands return to Earth in search of family in Florida after *something* hits the Atlantic ocean with such force that many coastlines are flooded. Disaster relief is inadequate and martial law is declared in the United States and other parts of the world. This section feels like (and is) a fictional exploration of societal and governmental fallout a la September 11, the Indonesian tsunami and Hurricane Katrina but worse, the disintegration that the United States could suffer from a disaster so extreme that recovery might not be possible, and the political and social structure that could emerge from such a catastrophic event.

Part two is a lot more interesting, although it can be summed up as "Mars is a Harsh Mistress." At the beginning of the story, the "Martians" see themselves as Earth people living in an outpost. Events arising from the Big Wave disaster and the disappearance of the most important man on earth makes the Martians start seeing themselves as a separate nation. And of course, Ray Garcia-Strickland is right in the middle of it.

Although this novel is definitely a good read (I think everything Varley writes is at the very least a good read) it's not a favorite of mine. The disaster section is realistic and upsetting, but it lacks focus. The second section is a lot more enjoyable and might have worked a bit better if it had been the center of the novel. And the squeezer technology still rings false for me. It seems so unrealistic and impossible. Since it's the foundation of the technology at the center of this series, that's a problem.

The "Thunder and Lightning" series is definitely set in a different science fiction universe than the "Eight Worlds" books. But the disaster on Earth and resulting fallout have a similar feel, that Earth has a shelf-life and it's approaching. And that the rest of the solar system and the stars is where our future lies.

For more about John Varley and a list of his works, click here.

Vampire Diaries: Smells Like Teen Spirit


“Anyone else think it should feel slightly more empowering?”

How? What? How? Three very excellent questions. And here’s a fourth:

Damon, will you feed me s’mores?

Person of Interest: Mission Creep


“Not every ex-soldier meets a reclusive billionaire.”

If the last episode was all about Finch, this one was Reese’s turn under the spotlight. It was a sad week for him. Or sadder.

American Horror Story: Murder House

"We have to get out of this house."

I think by now it's been established that this is a polarizing show that you'll either love or entirely despise. Online commentary seems to fall into one of two extremes, some considering it wonderfully intense and intriguing, others thinking it's one of the stupidest shows on television. Of course, it is pretty stupid. The writers are creating such a batshit little universe that it's hard not to laugh most of the time, the first residents of the house being this week's nuttiest creation. There's the disturbed Matt Ross character sewing up bats and fetal pigs in the basement, and his equally nutty wife roaming the halls in the modern day, shrieking at the sight of a kitchen appliance. Everything is being played so broadly that most of the laughs appear to be unintentional, but there's a method to this level of madness, and I think American Horror Story is carving out its own little niche successfully.

The Walking Dead: What Lies Ahead


Rick: “It can’t be harder than our journey’s been so far, can it?”

Good movies and shows haunt me. What I mean by this is that for days after, scenes pop up in my head. I remember little bits and mull them over. The Walking Dead is certainly one of those shows. The strong story lines, the great acting, the obvious skill of the directors make it fabulous TV, and the second season premiere promised that there wouldn’t be any momentum lost from the first season. The suspense was maintained with little rest throughout the whole ninety minutes. I can’t wait for the next episode.

Terra Nova: The Runaway


"They mostly come at night. Mostly."

Did they cast that little girl based on her resemblance to Carrie Henn? Why didn't they just give her a plastic doll head to carry around, too?

Ringer: The Poor Kids Do It Everyday

"I don't know you... and I never did."

So I guess Bridget is abandoning the concept of making this a 'short-term' deal. And I guess Siobhan is straight-up evil. I like both girls a lot (well, more than I did at the beginning of the series), but it would be foolish to claim that they were being written well. A problem with a show like this, one that depends on twists and cliffhangers, is that in the relentless pursuit of curve-balls to throw at us, the writers become susceptible to losing track of the protagonists involved. The Poor Kids Do It Everyday did a good job of adding new levels to both sisters, but I'm not sure they totally worked from a logic stand-point.

Fringe: Subject 9


“I never meant to harm you.”

Whereas last week’s episode left me—but not everyone—rather cold, this ostensible case-of-the-week was absolutely delightful. The difference? Although Olivia and Walter thought they were on the trail of a traditional fringy unsub, they were really pursuing their own destiny. That makes for good television, doesn’t it?

Eureka: What Goes Around, Comes Around


… in which random electromagnetic pockets begin wreaking havoc all over town. Meanwhile, Zoe learns that she’s been accepted for early admission to an undergrad pre-med program at Harvard.

Community: Remedial Chaos Theory

“Roxxxxannnnee!”

Far too many sitcoms are lazy. They play it safe by spoon feeding their audience predictable gags even a blind man can see the punchline coming from a mile away. Since we live in a unjust reality, these shows are often the more successful ones. This is why Two and A Half Men kicks off its ninth season with record ratings, while all three seasons of Arrested Development sit gathering dust on the dvd shelf (hurry up with that movie, already).

Dexter: Smokey and the Bandit


Dexter: "Is this what happens to serial killers at the end of their lives?"

In previous seasons, Dexter said more than once that growing old was not in the cards for him, that he would probably get caught or killed instead. But things have changed. Dexter is now thinking that he might very well live to grow old, and he doesn't want to be a nasty old man with a storage locker and no real relationship with Harrison. Maybe it's time to stop killing. Or at any rate, to get rid of his alarmingly full box of slides. Dexter should take them out on the Slice of Life and dump them in the ocean with Kenney's collection of teeth, where they belong.

Supernatural: Defending Your Life


"When did our black and white case turn to mud?"

Old ground for Dean. But interestingly, new ground for Sam.

Star Trek: The Paradise Syndrome


Kirk: "It's like discovering Atlantis. Or Shangri-la."

Kirk got more than his fair share of romantic interests during the original run of Trek. "The Paradise Syndrome" isn't my favorite, or even my second favorite, but it's far from the worst. It had a somewhat similar flavor as "City on the Edge of Forever" (a woman in a place and time completely removed from Kirk's life on the Enterprise) and a beautiful musical score. And I liked that they addressed Kirk's emotional state and stress level because in fact, a man with such exceptionally intense responsibilities might indeed long to get away from it all.

Red Thunder by John Varley

[This is a book review of Red Thunder by John Varley, first published in 2003.]

Red Thunder feels a lot like a John Varley interpretation of a Heinlein juvenile. I love nearly all of Robert A. Heinlein's works, including his juveniles; they're science fiction classics for a reason. I love Varley's works as well. You'd think a combination of the two would ring all of my bells. And they sort of do now. But when I first read this book, I was very much entertained, yes -- but I was also mildly disappointed and confused.

Red Thunder is told first person by Manny Garcia, an impoverished twenty-year-old college student living in Daytona, Florida in his failing family-run motel. His best friend Dak and their girlfriends Kelly and Alicia are out one night speeding across the beach in Dak's truck when they nearly run over an alcoholic former astronaut named Travis Broussard. The four young people become friends with Travis and his cousin Jubal, a brain damaged, emotionally fragile genius, who has invented an incredible quantum power source with unlimited potential.

We're never told exactly when the story takes place (at least not until book three), but it is obviously only a few years in the future. Two manned space flights, one Chinese and one American, are on their way to Mars. One of the seven astronauts on the American ship is Broussard's ex-wife, and when they learn that the ship is in trouble, Travis and the four young people decide to use Jubal's power source to build a space ship of their own and get to Mars first. The ship will be so fast that they'll beat the Chinese and be the first on the red planet, and they'll be able to rescue the American ship as well.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with this story. It is a ton of fun. I especially enjoy the well-drawn characters and their families -- especially Manny's sharpshooting mother and his clever girlfriend Kelly. Even though the story feels like a Heinlein juvenile, the details most definitely are not: the young people are sexually active, and Jubal's backstory in particular is horrendously tragic. And the details of getting a home-made space ship into the sky are done exceptionally well, right down to the TV dinners in a freezer bought from Sears, the problems with acquiring working space suits, the graffiti artist brought in to decorate the ship.

It's the foundation of the story that I find problematic. The magical quantum power source that will solve all of the world's energy needs is just too good to be true. Completing a working space ship in such a small amount of time is hard to swallow as well, no matter how well written the details. And the entire story rests upon these two plot elements.

That said, this novel is still very much worth reading. Red Thunder is the first book of Varley's Thunder and Lightning series, although I didn't know it was a series when I first read it. If you're a Heinlein fan, the references are great fun. Many of the character names are from Heinlein's novels, and as already mentioned, the story has the strong flavor of a Heinlein juvenile while not being all that juvenile. And Red Thunder does its job of establishing a specific science fiction universe and introducing humanity to the planet Mars.

For more about John Varley and a list of his works, click here.

Vampire Diaries: The Reckoning


“The species has become such a broody lot.”

Senior Prank Night is all about memory-making: crazy fun, minor vengeance on loved and hated teachers, and a community of young people coming together despite their differences. Senior year is typically (on TV, that is) associated with putting the kid-stuff of petty rivalries and mean-girliness behind. It’s one last youthful gasp before the onset of adulthood, or at least college.

American Horror Story: Home Invasion

"Is everybody crazy?"

This episode toned down the supernatural insanity that made the pilot just as attention-grabbing as it was unbearable, but it's still clear that American Horror Story is focused on plaguing its central family with ludicrous levels of misery. It's something that too often affected Ryan Murphy's other series Nip/Tuck, which became over-reliant on terrible things happening to its core group of characters to keep things soapy and dramatic. But, if anything, the groundwork is being laid for a fascinating show mythology, and that ought to keep people tuned in for at least a couple more weeks.

Newsflash: Haven Renewed and Other Stories

Last week was all about cancellations (so long, The Playboy Club, Free Agents, How to be a Gentleman, we hardly cared to know you). This week seems to be all about renewals and pick ups. And for shows we give a damn about, too.

--Despite earlier rumours that the series was facing cancellation, Syfy have renewed Haven for a 13-episode third season. The network also announced that Christmas Specials for Eureka, Warehouse 13 and Haven will air 6th December, the fourth season of Merlin will start 6th January and the second season of Being Human and the first season of my favourite guilty pleasure, Lost Girl, will both start 16th January.

--The CW has picked up Ringer, Hart of Dixie and The Secret Circle for full seasons.

--The BBC have renewed Case Histories for a second season. Based on the books by Kate Atkinson, the series stars Jason Isaacs as Jackson Brodie, a former police officer now working as a private investigator in Edinburgh. The first season will start airing on PBS this Sunday. Watch it, it's great.

--Boardwalk Empire has also been renewed for a third season by HBO.

Merlin: The Darkest Hour (2)

“I look at you and I wonder about myself. Could I knowingly give up my life for something?”

Well, I certainly didn't see that coming, although I really should have.

Person of Interest: Ghosts


In this episode we were treated to a lot of mythology, which is a bold move to be made so early in the series. We’ve barely known these characters, and we’re already delving into Finch’s past. And it was good.

Ringer: A Whole New Kind of Bitch

"That's your excuse for sleeping with my husband? You're her twin?"

This was the strongest episode so far, if only because the writers are in the process of fixing some of Ringer's inherent problems. The biggest being that the entire premise of this show is more than a little, I don't know, silly: "Solution to my twin sister supposedly killing herself? I got it! I'll steal her entire identity!" The best moment here was Gemma's on-point put-down of Bridget's elaborate lie. As much as Bridget likes to claim that she's only keeping this charade up in order to 'fix things' in Siobhan's life, her actions are pretty self-serving.

Doctor Who/Torchwood/The Sarah Jane Adventures Crossover Guide

Doctor Who has spawned two spin-off series' since its return in 2005. Doctor Who sits at the heart of the franchise, with The Sarah Jane Adventures and Torchwood catering for the children and adult ends of the market. The question is: how does it all fit together? Below is a chronology of the show's main crossover episodes. It's by no means exhaustive; but what follows should be enough to give the new viewer a rough idea of what to expect, and the order in which to expect it.

**Mild Spoilers Follow**

DOCTOR WHO -- SEASON ONE (March - June, 2005)

1.09 The Empty Child (1)
1.10 The Doctor Dances (2)

A cool two parter -- firstly, because it's Captain Jack's first appearance in DW; secondly, because it's future showrunner Steven Moffat's first DW script. (Excluding spoof "Doctor Who and the Curse of Fatal Death".) And what a belter it is. Are you my mummy?

1.11 Boom Town
1.12 Bad Wolf (1)
1.13 The Parting of the Ways (2)

Also featuring Captain Jack. “The Parting of the Ways” is significant as it documents an essential event in Captain Jack's history.

DOCTOR WHO -- SEASON TWO (December, 2005 - July, 2006)

Although Captain Jack doesn't physically appear, there are numerous TW references in season two.

2.02 Tooth and Claw

Queen Victoria orders the formation of the Torchwood Institute; its purpose to defend the United Kingdom from alien attack.

2.03 School Reunion

Not a series crossover per se, but an example of Classic Who crossing over with New Who. Third/Fourth Doctor's companion Sarah Jane Smith makes her first appearance -- and totally steals the show. Tin mutt K9 also has a cameo.

2.12 Army of Ghosts (1)
2.13 Doomsday (2)

Our first glimpse of the Torchwood Institute. Also worthy of mention is Freema Agyeman's first appearance as Adeola Oshodi, cousin of Martha Jones. Freema later (and some would say bizarrely) goes on to play Martha Jones in season three.

TORCHWOOD -- SEASON ONE (2006-2007)

Torchwood's first season proper! Surprisingly, there are no DW crossovers; just lots of swearing and sex. Unless, of course, you count the TARDIS as a character -- and after "The Doctor's Wife", who's to say she isn't ? The sexy beast!

1.13 End of Days

The TARDIS materialises, Jack runs towards it, and ends up in season three of DW.

DOCTOR WHO -- SEASON THREE (December, 2006 - June, 2007)

3.11 Utopia.

Jack finally catches up with the Doctor and confronts him about the events of “The Parting of the Ways”.

3.12 The Sound of Drums (1)
3.13 Last of the Time Lords (2)

Jack and Martha leave the TARDIS.

THE SARAH JANE ADVENTURES -- SEASON ONE (Jan - November, 2007)

No Crossovers.

TORCHWOOD -- SEASON TWO (January - April, 2008)

2.06 Reset
2.07 Dead Man Walking
2.08 A Day in the Death

Martha Jones joins the Torchwood team as Medical Officer following the death of a team member. She sticks around for three episodes.

THE SARAH JANE ADVENTURES -- SEASON TWO (September - December, 2008)

2.11 Enemy of the Bane (1)
2.12 Enemy of the Bane (2)

A Classic Who crossover, with the Brig himself, Nicholas Courtney, turning up to give the Bane a ruddy good kick up the bottom. This was originally intended to be a New Who crossover featuring Martha Jones, but Freema was too busy working on Law & Order: UK, and was subbed at the last minute.

DOCTOR WHO -- SEASON FOUR (December, 2007 - January, 2010)/TORCHWOOD -- CHILDREN OF EARTH (July, 2009)/THE SARAH JANE ADVENTURES -- SEASON THREE (October - November, 2009)

All three shows intermingled during 2009. The chronology starts off with DW, jumps to TW, then SJA, before returning to DW.

Doctor Who:

4.02 The Fires of Pompeii

Notable for Karen Gillan's first appearance as a soothsayer. Karen returned in season five as the Eleventh Doctor's companion, Amy. Not exactly a crossover; I just felt compelled to mention it.

4.04 The Sontaran Strategem (1)
4.05 The Poison Sky (2)
4.06 The Doctor's Daughter

Martha Jones returns for a three episode story arc, before vanishing again, only to reappear in the two-part season finale.

4.12 The Stolen Earth (1)
4.13 Journey's End (2)

This should have been a crossover made in heaven: Captain Jack makes his now customary cameo, and is joined by Sarah Jane Smith for a triple show collision. Even Martha shows up. Unfortunately, it's all a bit of a lame duck.

Torchwood - Children of Earth:

This five part spectacular sits between DW's “Planet of the Dead” and "The Waters of Mars". But there's no essential continuity, so its placing is pretty much unimportant.

The Sarah Jane Adventures:

3.05 The Wedding of Sarah Jane Smith (1)
3.06 The Wedding of Sarah Jane Smith (2)

David Tennant shows up for one last hurrah. Chronologically, this two-parter sits between "Planet of the Dead" and "The Waters of Mars", and features Tennant's final scenes as the Doctor.

Doctor Who:

4.18 The End of Time (2)

Jack turns up for a quick cameo alongside Russell Tovey (AKA the improbably named Midshipman Alonso Frame). Sarah Jane Smith also makes an appearance.

DOCTOR WHO -- SEASON FIVE (April - June, 2010)

Russell T. Davies left DW in 2009, and was replaced as showrunner by Steven Moffat. As a result, both DW and TW essentially became separate shows. There were no TW crossovers in season five; but there was a SJA crossover.

THE SARAH JANE ADVENTURES -- SEASON FOUR (October - November, 2010)

4.05 Death of the Doctor (1)
4.06 Death of the Doctor (2)

Matt Smith turns up in an episode also featuring Katy Manning. (One of Worzel's ex-companions.)

DOCTOR WHO -- SEASON SIX (December, 2010 - October, 2011)

Again, no crossovers.

TORCHWOOD -- MIRACLE DAY (July - Sept, 2011)

TW season four appears chronologically after "A Good Man Goes to War", and runs concurrently with "Let's Kill Hitler", "Night Terrors" and "The Girl Who Waited". As with season five, apart from an occasional reference to the Doctor, there's no real continuity or crossover.

THE SARAH JANE ADVENTURES -- SEASON FIVE (October, 2011)

As of yet, no crossover.

Doctor Who: The Sea Devils

“He used to be a friend of mine once, a very good friend. In fact, you might almost say we were at school together”

Growing up, watching Doctor Who was a lot like dating River Song; everything was in the wrong order. Since the BBC only ever showed repeats sporadically, and my parents couldn't afford a Sky package, I was reliant on whatever cheap VHS I could find in car boot sales for my Who fix.

Terra Nova: What Remains


"So you're going to tell her it's twenty years later than she thinks, and she's gone back in time eighty-five million years, but you think a husband is going to confuse her?"

I often find this kind of plot annoying, but not this time. This was the best episode so far. And why? Cute fun character development time.

Trailer for The Avengers


The new trailer for Joss Whedon's latest movie, The Avengers, is now available online. It has something to do with superheroes...oh, who cares? It's Joss Whedon!

Let us know what you think in the comments. Will His Jossiness finally get his vengeance on movie-goers and film studios for not liking Serenity enough to give us a sequel?






Dexter: Once Upon a Time


Deb: "God! Why can't things just stay the same?"

I kept thinking, serviceable episode. Maybe it was because of all the scenes in the service station.

Community: Competitive Ecology

“Offence taken!”

I've noticed a pattern emerging with this season of Community. Episodes will usually have a very strong A-story, one that features the various members of the study group, as well as a much weaker B-story that will focus on Greendale's other misfits like Chang and the Dean. 'Competitive Ecology' followed that pattern to the letter. The A-story was great, the best so far this season. As for the B-story... I'll get to that in a minute.

American Horror Story: Pilot


"Great. It's a real Addams Family house."

Ryan Murphy has always been criticized for pushing the envelope so much that his series become contrived and ridiculous. It's what he's become more or less famous for. Finally, Murphy has found the one genre which can survive such outlandish insanity, and unsurprisingly his new FX thriller American Horror Story is entirely batshit. This is a pilot that exaggerates the grotesque, filling every corner of an ancient California house with all kinds of ugly depictions of terror and menace. Most of this works in an off-beat, absurdist kind of way; but then there are elements which are so crazy that you can't help but cackle at how silly this show is.

Fringe: Alone in the World


“I need more time!”

It is interesting to consider the development of television narrative devices. I maintain that TV today is a place of subtle, radical developments in traditional narrative structure, just as much as Victorian novels (particularly the sensational ones) often addressed the grim realities hiding under petticoats and behind cravats. Those wildly popular novels incorporated radical critiques of law and tradition into suspenseful narrative; in the same way, TV today takes radical storytelling risks, trusting the viewer to follow multiple timelines, alternate realities, astonishing improbabilities, and deeply entrenched metaphors amid chase scenes, unrequited love, and everyday travails as experienced by telegenic people.

Supernatural: The Girl Next Door


Sam: "Nothing in our lives is simple."

This episode was like a classic novel about the nature of tragedy, but a lot shorter and without the dense prose.