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Dead to the World by Charlaine Harris

[This review contains many, many spoilers.]

"I figured God had made me with the disability of telepathy, and he could cut me a little slack on the sex thing."

Justified: The Moonshine War

"So you want to transfer me?"
"Honestly, Raylan, I don't know who would take you."

Clean up and put away season one. Yank out a brand new story for season two. You'd think it would be disjointed, but this episode flowed beautifully from one major plotline to another.

Game Review: Star Wars: The Old Republic

(Video Game - PC)

Once in a while there is a franchise that is so massive, so pervasive that it literally transcends its original media. Star Wars broke that barrier decades ago. Movies, television, toys, books, comics, trading cards, a pen & paper role-playing game, and of course, video games.

Eureka: I'll Be Seeing You

...in which Allison’s life is on the line while Grant and Carter go Back to the Future, Part 2.

Eureka: The Ex-Files

...in which Grant struggles with Global’s role as a Department of Defense facility, while several characters are visited by figures from their pasts.

Eureka: Stoned

...in which an archaeological resource is discovered at the construction site for Jo’s new home, and soon after people working at the site begin turning into stone.

Eureka: Momstrosity

...in which Carter, Kevin, Grant, and Fargo go camping, while the town’s Level 6 A.I.’s suddenly begin developing emotional attachments.

Eureka: Crossing Over

...in which Claudia Donovan arrives from Warehouse 13, just as objects from the past begin materializing all over town.

Josie’s Best of 2012 (Yep)


I’ve been wracking my brain for weeks now, trying to come up with an interesting Best of 2011 post. I can’t. 2011 wasn’t a good year for me, and whenever I glance over the lists of shows that aired, particularly in the first half of the year, I just remember how sad, stressed, and exhausted I was when I watched them. I couldn’t even do a real Best of 2011 book list, since (for the first time in a decade) I didn’t keep track of the book I read for most of the year.

Instead, I want to make a pre-emptive strike against the possible whimpery apocalypse of 2012. This is what I want to feel, 12 months from now, when I look back on 2012 and smile. This is what I want next year’s list to look like, FlashForward-style.

10. Hooray! I have a job that I’m actually qualified for, and that does not require numerous other part-time, low-paying, no-insurance jobs to raise my income above the poverty line. I’m having a great time doing good, important work—and I have plenty of free time, too! I am surrounded by interesting co-workers. I look forward to continuing to settle in to my new town, where houses are affordable and the traffic is never bad. What a wonderful life!

9. I never thought I would say this, or even that I could, but Doctor Who has gotten even better. After the sixth season’s epic tale of love and death in the time vortex, I didn’t think Moffat and Co. could possibly top the delightful convolutions that had come before—and I certainly didn’t expect a new set of villains even scarier than the Stone Angels! And wasn’t the Gamma Forest beautiful?

8. I was heartbroken when I heard that Fringe was going to be canceled (although I can’t say it was a surprise). But Fox’s decision to give the writers enough time to wrap up all the alternaverses and the love affairs (so glad Lincoln Lee is finally happy!) made the super-powered 2-hour season finale in May 2012 one of the best episodes of the year, if not the decade.

7. The epic moral ambiguity of Game of Thrones has gotten even saucier, even zanier, and even bloodier than Season One. The drastic budget increase meant more battles, more blood, and more Dothraki sea—and I, for one—think the show is even more mindblowing than the books. After all, how often do you see dragons these days?

6. Person of Interest, meanwhile, has finally come into its own. Executive producer and creator Jonathan Nolan finally won a victory in the battle with CBS’s insistence on standalone procedurals, and JC’s and Ben Linus’s ongoing and epic struggle against crime lord Mark Sheppard has been appointment viewing for weeks now. At first, I was wary about the decision to set the second season in the midst of the zombie apocalypse, but the inclusion of the undead only emphasizes the political post-9/11 undertones of the show. We are all zombies now.

5. While there aren’t zombies on Once Upon a Time, the writers finally decided to let their imaginations run wild in establishing inventive and exciting mythology. After a delightful start and a slow, slow buildup of the actual plot of the show in the first half of season one, January 2012 brought complications, double-crosses, and nuanced villains into the foreground. Snow White’s death (if she is dead…on this show, who knows?) is probably the highlight of this game-changing fantasy show—at least so far!

4. Supernatural deserves a big shout-out for concluding after seven great seasons. I know the last episode hit Billie hard: she’d devoted quite a lot of energy to reviewing each of the 148 episodes, but even she agrees that the ending was perfect for both Dean and Sam; all the heartache of the past seven seasons has finally paid off. I’ll miss you, Winchester boys!

3. Who knew that Community would come back from a scary mid-season hiatus even stronger than before? It’s hard to believe now that we were all so worried, back in 2011, about the fate of the little program that brought us such perfect episodes as “Remedial Chaos Theory.” I must admit, I got a little nervous when I realized they were doing yet another paintball episode for the third-season finale, but their decision to do a vampires-in-zero-gravity theme proved their willingness to sacrifice all dignity for the cause of ironic punch-drunk laughs. Thanks for the three-more-seasons renewal, NBC!

2. Speaking of vampires: how is any list about the best of 2012 complete without mention of the Vampire Diaries? From the alternate-reality Alaric/Damon hook-up to the real Elena, Damon, and Stefan mass orgy to Caroline’s even better superpowers (not to mention Bonnie’s tragic but welcome death), VD in 2012 has had more OMG moments than a Bible Belt tent revival.

1. Best of the 2012 has to go to one show—you know you’ve been waiting for me to mention it! Insert Show Name Here has finally given us the complicated storytelling, great characters, and exciting genre-bending action that we’ve all been waiting for since we realized Lost was ending. So far, ISNH has lived entirely up to its promise of compelling and fascinating mysteries with real, relevant answers. Finally, all that clue-hunting is paying off! What a treat it is to take part in internet theorization while safe in the comfort of knowing that it’s worth my time and energy.

And that's all, folks! 2012 gets a four out of four billiedouxes from me. Here's hoping for a great 2013!

Merlin: The Sword in the Stone, Part 2

“You have magic.”

I have a lot of mixed feelings about this finale. Overall I thought it was a good episode and a strong end to the season. But there was a lot about it that just didn't sit right with me.

Justified: Bulletville

Raylan: "You didn't happen to bring your rocket launcher, did you?"
Boyd: "I didn't think to pack one."

If they hadn't gotten another season (and I'm so glad they did), this episode would have worked beautifully as a series finale. The father/son conflict at the heart of the story was resolved, miraculously without Raylan or Boyd actually committing patricide, but with Arlo defanged and Bo dead. (Sons two, Dads zero.) Although there were a few semi-pointless non-arc criminal-of-the-week episodes, this first season was pretty strong. And it certainly ended with a whole lot of bang bang.

Justified: Fathers and Sons

"You are determined to be contrary, even if it gets you strung up from a tree."

The title of this episode could pretty much cover the entire season. Raylan versus Arlo, Boyd versus Bo. With Ava as a wild card stuck right in the middle.

Doctor Who: The Doctor, the Widow and the Wardrobe

Doctor: 'Happy crying. Humany wumany.'

I’m starting to think that Matt Smith was made for Christmas. He’s like James Bond, Superman and Father Christmas all rolled into one. Tonight’s episode had it all: an action packed opening sequence, a cutesy fairy tale middle section, and an ending which could only have left the steeliest heart unmoved. Throw in the Magna Carta, hammocks, a window disguised as a mirror, a mirror disguised as a window, and it pretty much had the lot. Even lemonade on tap.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011)

Greeted with an oil-drenched title sequence coupled with a heavily synthesized version of "Immigrant Song" by Trent Reznor, it's safe to say this movie starts out with a bang. The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo follows that insane opening with a dense, tense, and adult thriller directed by the guy who did Fight Club and Se7en. It was riveting, and occasionally difficult to watch. The material was so raw that I sat in stunned silence or bemusement as the events screamed by. For a movie that's nearly three hours long, I didn't feel it dragged for a moment.

Breaking Bad: Gray Matter

"All I have left is how I choose to approach this."

This one was about the road not taken, and not just in the present.

Justified: Veterans

"Arlo, use your words."

So far: Dads one, Sons zero.

If there was a common thread in this melange of drug war set-up, it was Raylan and Boyd both trying to be their own men while also trying to control their out-of-control criminal fathers. Raylan and Boyd are very much two sides of the same coin, both tough, smart and unlikely to give up. Ditto the dads. There was even a scene where Arlo and Bo sat at the kitchen table talking about how they were in control of their sons. Which they were not.

2012 Film Preview

2011 is almost no more. Long live 2012!

After a year of sequels, prequels, remakes and comic book movies, we can now look forward to, well, another year of sequels, prequels, remakes and comic book movies. And there just might even be a few original movies sandwiched in amongst all the sequels, prequels, remakes and comic book movies.

So, faithful readers, here for your reading pleasure is a kinda complete list of all the big sequels, prequels, remakes and comic book movies coming your way in 2012.

Underworld: Awakening - January 20

The Woman in Black – February 3

Be afraid, Harry Potter. Be very afraid.

John Carter – March 9

The Hunger Games – March 23

Wrath of the Titans – March 30

The Cabin in the Woods – April 13

The Avengers – May 4

Some superhero movie from some guy who made some show about a girl who fights vampires.

Dark Shadows – May 11

Battleship – May 18

Were there always aliens in Battleship?

Men in Black 3 – May 25

Might be worth seeing just for Josh Borlin's frighteningly accurate Tommy Lee Jones impersonation.

Snow White and the Huntsman – June 1

Prometheus – June 6

Ridley Scott's Alien prequel that isn't an Alien prequel but looks a lot like an Alien prequel.

Jack the Giant Killer – June 15

Brave – June 22

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter – June 22

G.I. Joe: Retaliation – June 29

The Amazing Spider-Man – July 3

The Dark Knight Rises – July 20

The epic conclusion to the Dark Knight legend where Batman struggles to understand a single word that Bane is saying.

Total Recall - August 3

Skyfall – October 26

007 will return.

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 – November 16

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey – December 14

Peter Jackson returns to Middle Earth and tries to turn Dwarves into heartthrobs.

World War Z - December 21

Billie's Best of 2011


Happy new year!

The beauty of retrospect and the future of American Horror Story

[This post contains spoilers for the entire first season, so beware.]

For those of you who don't already know, Ryan Murphy and FX president John Landgraf yesterday revealed their plans for season two of American Horror Story, which involve an entirely different story, an entirely different cast and new representations of the word 'horror'. It's a ballsy move, sacrificing season one titans like Jessica Lange, Connie Britton and Frances Conroy in favor of fresh incarnations of nutty carnage. But it's also a development that speaks volumes about the ambition of the series as well as cable TV's willingness to break new ground.

Justified: The Hammer

Ava: "Didn't the district attorney order you to stay the hell away from Boyd?"
Raylan: "Yeah. It was more of a suggestion."

Such serious topics. Why was this one so much fun?

American Horror Story: Afterbirth

"That's all very touching, but where the hell's the baby?"

This was a curious finale. Though I guess the episode title hinted that this was more about the calm after the storm than anything too apocalyptic. I understand that "Afterbirth" was thrown together under a tight schedule, the producers cutting a planned thirteenth episode and instead making this one a ninety-minute show, and it did sort of look like it. The script had an odd structure, bouncing from flashback sequences to the sudden demise of a major character, straight into Beetlejuice hijinks and a flash-forward to three years later. There were some wonderful moments, of course, but certain stories fell a little flat after a year of so much intense foreboding.

Terra Nova Finale

I stopped reviewing Terra Nova with episode four. I'm a sci-fi geek and I really wanted to love this show, but in truth, I just sort of like it, which isn't enough to make me want to keep writing about it. Time travel, dinosaurs and Stephen Lang as Taylor kept me watching, though.

Justified: Hatless

Gary: "This is what you do on your vacation?"
Raylan: "Apparently, Tahiti sucks."

What a perfectly constructed episode. It started out with a lot of dumb, and everyone was a lot smarter in the end.

Merlin: The Sword in the Stone, Part 1

“I feel like such a fool. I put such trust in him. All this time, I was blind to his treachery as I was to Morgana's.”

'The Sword in the Stone' has a lot in common with season three's big finale, 'The Coming of Arthur'. Both featured Camelot falling to an enemy army, Morgana becoming queen, the king having a crisis of confidence after being betrayed by someone close to him, and Merlin and Arthur forced to go on the run. But this was bigger, better and, most surprisingly of all, funnier.

2012 Premiere Dates


The end is nigh! As you know, the world will end in 2012—science and the Mayans have told us so. In the meantime, however, we’ve got a better ending coming up: the end of the doldrums that are the winter hiatus.

Click on for a list of shows that we review, shows we don’t review but like to watch, and premieres that we plan to review…as long as we find enough time between stocking up on canned goods for the zombie apocalypse and attempting to placate our future overlords, the dolphins.

Sherlock: Sunday, January 1 (UK), May 6 (US)

Hawaii Five-0: Monday, January 2

Vampire Diaries: Thursday, January 5

The Secret Circle: Thursday, January 5

Merlin (US): Friday, January 6

Supernatural: Friday, January 6

Once Upon a Time: Sunday, January 8

Downton Abbey (US): Sunday, January 8

House of Lies: Sunday, January 8

Castle: Monday, January 9

30 Rock: Thursday, January 12

Parks and Recreation: Thursday, January 12

Person of Interest: Thursday, January 12

Fringe: Friday, January 13

Alcatraz: Monday, January 16

Gossip Girl: Monday, January 16

Being Human (US/Canadian version): Monday, January 16

Lost Girl: Monday, January 16

Glee: Tuesday, January 17

Justified: Tuesday, January 17

Ringer: Tuesday, January 31

The Walking Dead: Sunday, February 12

Which show are you looking forward to most, Mr. Dolphin?

Dexter: This is the Way the World Ends

Dexter: "One thing I'm sure I have faith in is the staying power of animal tranquilizers."

Trailer: The Dark Knight Rises

T'was the week before Christmas and all through the house, everyone was online downloading the first full trailer for The Dark Knight Rises, the final chapter in Christopher Nolan's Batman trilogy.

Even the mouse.



Looks good, doesn't it?

Jess's 2011 Favorites


For 2011, I once again bring you the list of shows least likely to stack up on my DVR. (Except for the show pictured at right, which I often couldn’t bear to delete after watching!)

Star Trek: Day of the Dove

Kirk: "We've been under stress before. It's never set us at each other's throats."

"Day of the Dove" is rather like a starship-sized game of real life Risk, and something of a rehash of "Wolf in the Fold." So the anti-war propaganda was blindingly obvious, and the alien simply a mechanism to tell the story. I liked this episode a lot when I was a kid, and I still do.

Justified: Blowback

"I'm officially requisitioning this chicken."

Three confrontations in one episode, and no one got shot. How nice that for once, everybody lived.

Warehouse 13: The Greatest Gift

... in which the untidy Warehouse strikes again, as Pete inadvertently gets whammied by a falling artifact in the Aisle of Noel, causing him to be erased from history.

Club Dead by Charlaine Harris

[This review contains mondo, mondo spoilers.]

"I was missing Bill in a most elemental and unexpected way. My first clue had been the tug-below-the-waist I'd felt when I'd watched my tape of The Last of the Mohicans the week before and I'd fixated on Daniel Day-Lewis bounding through the forest. If I could appear from behind a tree before he saw Madeleine Stowe..."

Merlin: The Hunter's Heart

“Are you really wise Merlin or just a pratling fool? I can no longer tell.”

There was a lot about this episode that annoyed me.

Once Upon a Time: The Heart is a Lonely Hunter

"Your life is now in my hands... forever."

This week we delved deep into the psyche of the first huntsman in history who could be a spokesman for PETA, with a touch of Cowardly Lion. And heartbreaking taken to its limit.

American Horror Story: Birth

"Please tell me you're slitting the throat of a chicken next because I've always found that very dramatic."

Labor is hard enough already. You're entirely exposed, surrounded by masked strangers, you're bleeding, you're experiencing pain like you've never felt before, and someone's literally coming out of you. With all that in mind, Vivien had it rough tonight. Strapped to a table and flanked by bloody ghosts and Dr. Frankenstein, in a room bathed in red light with decor that can only be described as 'cult chic'. She loses a baby, has the other immediately taken away by a crazed wingnut and, oh, then goes on to bleed out and die. I think we can all agree that she's had one horrible six months.

Breaking Bad: Cancer Man

"I have cancer. Lung cancer. It's bad."

Rage issues, anyone? Walt just dealt with an annoying human being by blowing up the guy's car. Jerks in the vicinity of Albuquerque, beware.

Glee: Extraordinary Merry Christmas

“What’s wrong with a story that’s a little sad? Or a song that’s a little depressing? I mean, that’s part of Christmas too, right? It’s the sad things that make you remember what’s really important.”

What’s wrong with that? Well, it’s not Glee!

Community: Regional Holiday Music

“Why don’t we let Britta sing her awkward song?”

After years of covert attacks, Community has finally declared all out war on Glee. And it couldn't have made for a better episode.

Dexter: Talk to the Hand

"Maybe it takes a beast to catch a beast."

I've been brooding obsessively about this episode since I saw it last night, but I haven't reached a verdict. It was exciting, funny, frustrating, and probably contained too much set-up for a penultimate episode. And there was the dream incest that wasn't really incest. Although it felt like incest to me.

Justified: Blind Spot

"So here I am, going back and forth between light and dark."

Everything in this episode was backwards, and in shades of gray. We think it's Bo Crowder who was behind the murder attempt on Ava, but instead it was the Miami cartel again, and Raylan was the intended victim. We think that Sheriff Mosley is a good guy, but we discover he was working with the Cartel, and that he even had understandable (arguably just) reasons for doing so. And even though Raylan put himself in danger, it was Ava who saved the day.

Doctor Who: Planet of the Daleks

"Courage isn't just a matter of not being frightened, you know. It's being afraid and doing what you have to do anyway."

Terrance Dicks’ original plan for season ten was to produce an epic tale in the same vein as the William Hartnell twelve-part lost classic 'The Dalek Masterplan'. However, Douglas Camfield, the director of the story, warned him off, citing the production difficulties of shooting such an epic story. Instead, Dicks devised two linked stories that eventually became 'Frontier In Space' and 'Planet of the Daleks'.

Eureka: Do You See What I See?

... in which some holiday surprises don’t go according to plan (naturally), causing the whole town to become animated.

Breaking Bad: ... And the Bag's in the River

"There's got to be more to a human being than that."

'The Cat's in the Bag' was horribly funny, and I do mean 'horribly,' as in full of horror. But this episode was just tragic.

Once Upon a Time: The Shepherd

“Smile, son. You're on the road to true love.”

It’s funny that the plot I’m least interested in has brought the best episodes so far. I really don’t care about Snow White and Price Charming because I’m absolutely sure they’ll eventually hook up, despite the obstacles put in the way. Despite that, I was wowed more than once watching this episode.

Farscape: Picture If You Will

A junk dealer’s friendly parting gift for Chiana quickly takes a turn for the sinister as it begins to predict the future, including the deaths of Moya’s crew.

Justified: The Collection

"His last night of freedom, and he's talking to someone about his Hitlers?"

Another criminal-of-the-week episode, with murder, a faithless wife, and her scheming lover who had a crisis of conscience.

Glee: Hold On To Sixteen

Sam Evans returns to McKinley to help New Directions face-off against The Troubletones at Sectionals, Tina tries to help Mike convince his father to support his dancing dreams, and Quinn considers exposing Shelby and Puck.

Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy

“There's a mole, right at the top of the Circus. And he's been there for years.”

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, the first novel in John le Carre's Krala trilogy, is one of the greatest spy thrillers of the 20th century. The BBC's 1979 adaptation with Alec Guinness as George Smiley is one of the finest pieces of television drama the corporation has ever produced. So is Tomas Alfredson's film adaptation equally as great?

Doctor Who: Frontier In Space

"I prefer to put my faith in the mind probe."

Nothing dates more than yesterday's vision of the future. On second thoughts, scratch that. Nothing dates more than yesterday's vision of what everyone will be wearing in the future.

Merlin: A Herald of the New Age

“I had some earlier. If I have too much, I need to pee all the time. Ask Arthur. I'm always peeing.”

Hmmm, a references to Merlin urinating. I have a sneaky suspicion that this just might be a Howard Overman episode.

American Horror Story: Smoldering Children

"Hi, I'm Tate. I'm dead. Want to hook up?"

While this felt like the end for Larry, I loved the shades given to his relationship with Constance. Was there ever any love there?