“Welcome to the club.”
Thank goodness for the last scene. While watching, I started to formulate an angry, intense, and unwelcome feminist rant about how VD was ruining Elena—and possibly young girls everywhere. I didn’t want to write it, but I couldn’t see any way around it. God bless Caroline, vampire extraordinaire.
Let’s start at the end. Elena has been sired to Damon, whose blood (via Dr. Fell) made her an unintentional vampire. That’s why she can’t drink from blood bag, why she agreed with Damon in even the oddest of situations—and even why she has become so volatile: Damon told Elena that she’s more like him that she realized, and that’s why her behavior has been all over the map. Caroline and Stefan weren’t party to that conversation, but I’ll bet someone puts two and two together soon enough.
And again with the thanks and praise. All together, now!
That’s not to say that I hated the Damon/Elena sex scene. It was incredibly sexy, and I make no secret of preferring Damon to Stefan. But it didn’t feel earned, and if those two kids do get together, I want it to matter. Even before Caroline’s realization, it felt rushed: a product of Elena’s wacky uncontrolled emotions, which have been a thorn in my side since the season premiere.
Jeremy has some wacky uncontrolled emotions, too. (Isn’t it interesting that VD has come to rely on supernatural personality changes rather than organic ones?) He is, in Damon’s phrase, undeniably becoming Connor 2.0, and I suspect things will only get worse. In fact, I suspect that the hunters map is going to reveal that the only cure to vampirism is to kill a hunter with a complete mark, and Elena will be unwilling to sacrifice her little brother for her own urges. She certainly wasn’t too happy about Stefan pushing Jeremy into killing vampires.
That’s assuming she regains her real self, of course. We know from Tyler’s and Phoebe Tonkin’s attempts to de-sire the hybrids just how difficult a task that is. How would it work for a vampire? Maybe if Damon asks her to do something she simply can’t do, like killing Matt or Jeremy? Whatever the solution is, surely Stefan will find it. And hopefully he’ll resist rubbing our noses in the fact that he was right: it turns out Elena isn’t being the person she is supposed to be.
Is Jeremy? Why is he a hunter, after all? And can he be de-hunterified when/if Elena is de-vampirized? I’ve never been a huge Jeremy fan, but I like his friendship with Matt, and I’m still curious about whether he and Bonnie are still dating. If Jeremy dies, I might never find out.
Meanwhile, there’s trouble in Tylerland. Our resident galoot has decided to become jealous about Caroline’s pseudo-relationship with Klaus. The whole “fake relationship threatens to ruin real relationship” trope feels a little tired, but I’m happy for anything that brings me more Caroline.
• Prof. Shane: “Professor by day, pageant judge by other day.”
• Prof. Shane: “I’ll just follow the scent of hairspray and world domination.”
• Prof. Shane: “Did you just accuse me of mass murder in the middle of a high school pageant?”
• Damon: “Just because her dad blew up in a house with a dozen people in it doesn’t mean she should get a tiara.”
• Prof. Shane: “I must be the least intimidating mass murderer in existence.”
• Caroline: “You and her—epic.” Nice callback to the pilot episode, there.
• This episode had great, sparkly dialogue. If I missed any great lines, add them in the comments!
• I think it’s really weird, sire bond notwithstanding, that Elena chose to go to the Salvatores’ house and not, for instance, Caroline’s.
• The excellent Buffy episode “Something Blue” came to mind while watching this. At least Damon didn’t suggest that Tyler and Caroline get married, or that anyone get the “funny syphilis.”
• Everyone looked so pretty in this episode. I loved Caroline’s peplum jacket. It went perfectly with her sassy attitude.
• Does Prof. Shane remind anyone of a cut-rate James Frain?
I feel like I should apologize for giving VD so much grief; I suspect that I should be more trusting of my favorite shows in the future. What do you all think of the revelation about Elena’s sire bond?
Four out of four least intimidating mass murderers.
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