As the world’s throbbing, beating heart beats on and on like a perky metronome of viscera, we are forced to reckon with the fundamental questions of the tragic corn maze that is human existence: Is it ever right to fall in love with your brother’s girl? Is it ever possible to move on? Is sarcasm ever an unexpected response?
This episode had a lot of great dialogue, some overblown compliments, and one deliciously underblown compliment. Important stuff happened—Damon’s back!—but some of the major plot points seem either hackneyed or out of character.
Like how Bonnie is, once again, stuck in an impossible self-sacrificing situation that doesn’t make much sense. 1994-world is the same day on a loop. Damon and Bonnie could have easily put the ritual on pause, figured out a way to immobilize Kai for 24 hours, and tried to get back home safely the next day. Bonnie’s wounds might have even disappeared; the rules for the re-set aren’t 100% clear. But no: Bonnie sacrificed herself to save Damon, and Damon let her. Bonnie sacrificing herself is par for the course, but I wish Damon had made more of an effort not to be saved. I think his character has grown past that sort of selfishness, hasn’t it?
Stefan’s decision to abandon Ivy and Caroline seems equally out of character. He has been disengaged from everything for a while, and we know from last week how important the rituals of moving-on are for him. But does Stefan really need to abandon someone that he is responsible (Ivy) and abuse the trust of someone who has been his friend for so long (Caroline)? Even Alaric is angry at Stefan.
Will Damon’s return fix Stefan? I hope so. We’re five episodes into this season, and no true villain has emerged, although Tripp (and the threat of discovery) is a contender. But I’m starting to wonder if the villain is the group: like the theme of Buffy’s fourth season, the real threat is a lack of unity and communication among our heroes. If Damon can be Stefan’s point of re-entry into the TVD madness, then the plot-wheels will start to move a bit more, right?
Damon’s return just might fix Alaric. Then again, he’s doing okay on his own. Sure, vamp-angst and hunger pangs. But Damon can help Alaric get his drink on, and the sexy, un-compellable doctor is both okay with his drinking and impressed with everything else. Just witness her hyperbolic and tipsy declaration of affection: “I think you’re great. You’re brave, funny, not to mention maybe the most attractive man I’ve ever seen…and call me crazy, but I think I was meant to know you.” Aww.
That wasn’t the only over-the-top declaration of love this week. Elena’s decision to take her own advice and remain happy has left her…happy. Almost normal happy, which I frankly find a bit creepy; I’m not used to the characters on this show doing regular college-student things like dating regular people in regular ways. And Elena seems to be really into that guy whose name I still can’t remember: “You were a hero tonight. An absolutely, jaw-dropping, out-of-this-world hero. That’s my type.”
But the best declaration of affection was the low-key interplay between Bonnie and Damon, who have managed to put six seasons of animosity behind them without any dramatics:
Damon: “I’m sure there are about a billion people you’d rather be here with.”
Bonnie: “Not exactly.”
I assume—I hope—that Damon will do everything in his power to get Bonnie out of 1994-hell. Hopefully this Gemini coven, and/or Liv and Luke, will be of some assistance there. And maybe this can be Bonnie’s last death. She’s like the Kenny of The Vampire Diaries.
Bites and Pieces:
• Ivy: “I used to be a decent person. I got good grades. I went home for Christmas. I had a freaking Etsy store!”
• Ivy: “You know, the real tragedy of all this? I read He’s Just Not That Into You, and...”
• Elena: “You are like one hoodie and three missed haircuts away from becoming Professor Shane.”
• Alaric: “Are you asking me to help you with a breakup?”
• Can you grow corn in Georgia? Isn’t that more of a cottony place?
• Ivy saying “Erase!” to her victim was hilarious. It’s not an iPhone command, sweetheart.
• Tyler kept claiming that the car accident was, in fact, an accident. He certainly didn’t intend for it to happen, but he was texting while driving. I wish he’d taken a bit more responsibility. Because now Liv has to.
How many bottles of Zima out of four?
Josie Kafka reviews The Vampire Diaries, True Detective, Game of Thrones, and various other things that take her fancy. She is a full-time cat servant and part-time rogue demon hunter. (What's a rogue demon?)
- Next episode
- Vampire Diaries season 6
- Vampire Diaries home
- Watch this episode or the entire season now