The tenth book of the Discworld novels is considered to be a part of the Unseen University (UU) arc, but it also feels like its own thing as it addresses what happens when movies are made on the Disc, and the consequences of those Holy Wood* dreams.
An old man on a beach dies alone, unable to find a successor for his sacred duty. He mournfully relates this state of affairs to Death. With this last guardian is gone, strange ideas start entering the Disc, ideas that things from outside are eager to exploit.
Alchemists in Ankh-Morpork invent Octo-cellulose and are soon creating moving pictures, or clicks as they call them. They get this name mostly from the sounds the handles make when turned to whip the imps and salamanders inside their picture boxes to make the movies. Soon they and many other people all over the Disc are clamoring to go to a place called Holy Wood although they can't quite say why.
Victor Tugelbend, also known by his stage name, Victor Maraschino, is a student wizard who wishes to stay that way so he can keep getting a stipend from his uncle, but he quickly gets caught up in the clicks craze. Along with him, our other main protagonist is Theda Withel, usually referred to as Ginger, and whose stage name is Delores DeSyn. She's a lovely young woman that didn't want to just be a milkmaid, but it's more than just her wanting to be famous, something was calling her more strongly than anyone else. We also have Laddie the wonder dog as another sort of protagonist. He's an obvious parody of Lassie, and a genuinely good dog to boot.
This book also introduces us to a few new characters that we will be seeing again: Gaspode, a rather unfortunate dog that is one of the animals that has sapience thrust upon him by Holy Wood, has some great lines in the book and his friendship with Laddie is a lot of fun; Ponder Stibbons, just a student wizard here, but he will be a wizard to watch in future books; Windle Poons, the oldest wizard on the Disc and his amazing wheelchair; and the UU faculty that will be with us for a very long time, unlike prior incarnations, that tend to last less than one book. We get the Bursar, the Dean, the Chair, the Lecturer in Recent Runes, the Senior Wrangler, and most of all, the new Archchancellor, Mustrum Ridcully.
Ridcully is one of those characters that is a delight to read about, but I doubt we'd get along well in real life. He was chosen for the role of archchancellor as he had retired to the countryside many years ago and was referred to as ‘Ridcully the Brown.' They thought they were getting an easy to manipulate candidate with his country background, but boy, they got much more than they bargained for! He gets up far too early for the other staff, who prefer to sleep in, shouts a lot, especially at the poor Bursar, hunts almost everything, and while he does indeed talk to the animals like the other wizards imagined, it's mostly to swear at them when they get away from one of his crossbow shots. He's a larger-than-life character that adds a lot of great moments here and is a key figure in later books as well.
The Librarian, Detritus, and C.M.O.T. Dibbler return. Detritus gets to do more than just hit people; he even has a romance arc with a troll named Ruby. Ruby works at the Holy Wood troll bar, and he's smitten with her dance routine immediately. The Librarian is always great fun, and he even lets Ginger call him a monkey without violence, although she does apologize to him for that comment once he gives her a look and a specific 'ook.' Dibbler is fantastic here as well. Since he's a man that lives to make money, him becoming a film producer in Holy Wood is one hundred percent in character. He reaches that height in an amusing and sneaky fashion as befits both him and the Disc in general. Nobby and Colon from the watch and the Patrician all have amusing cameos as well.
Holy Wood explodes from an abandoned section of beach to a bustling town that expands faster than the carpenters can keep up with. The strange pull that so many feel that drives them to make the trek to Holy Wood is brushed off by most. Victor is more concerned, however; his former wizard training makes him a bit more knowledgeable about things that exist outside the normal dimensions, and he's worried about why this is all happening. He finds the scene of our introduction and takes the book the now dead man was keeping. This book is ancient, and the writing is in many different hands, going back so far that it is written in pictograms instead of letters at the start. This book and what it contains therein is a key part of the story of Holy Wood.
The clicks are making a ton of money at their height. The whole business of Holy Wood has a surreal feel to it as Sir Terry has the experience of the clicks parody the real life versions. Old style movie theaters with gilding and red velvet all over, movie posters that over promise what the films deliver, and people seeking their fortune in the clicks having to work as horse holders, waiters, and so on, eager for that big chance that may never come. While all this is happening, Ginger is walking in her sleep and visiting an ancient site in the hill on the beach, which concerns Victor greatly, although it ends up being a bit different than he originally expected, his original worry is mostly borne out as the book progresses. Sir Terry gives us an almost continuous barrage of humor and action as the story comes to end. It's a mix of what Discworld normally considers magic and the Holy Wood version of magic and was pure joy to reread after all these years.
There are so many references to classic movies and cartoons in this book that I couldn't even begin to list them all, but they include: The Blues Brothers, Looney Tunes and other classic cartoons, King Kong, War of the Worlds, The Seven Year Itch, Singin' in the Rain, Gone with the Wind, and many more. It's one of the books that isn't always so well-regarded by the fandom, but I had an absolute blast reading it. It's very much a parody of the movies and Hollywood of our world, with some wackiness added in that works so very well here, thanks to how well Sir Terry writes things. I find this book a joy to read, and it introduces many great characters, so for me, it's just shy of the top rating.
*On the Disc it is indeed Holy Wood instead of Hollywood.
3.875 (3 and 7/8) banged grains out of 4.
Some fun quotes:
By and large, the only skill the alchemists of Ankh-Morpork had discovered so far was the ability to turn gold into less gold.
"If you put butter and salt on it, it tastes like salty butter." (said by Peavie the alchemist after he created banged grains, the Discworld version of popcorn).
"'Twas Beauty that killed the beast," said the Dean, who liked to say things like that.
"No it wasn't," said the Chair. "It was splatting into the ground like that."
Morella is a Gen Xer who likes strange things a bit too much.
Lords and Ladies has the best Ridcully description:
ReplyDelete"It wasn’t that Ridcully was stupid. Truly stupid wizards have the life expectancy of a glass hammer. He had quite a powerful intellect, but it was powerful like a locomotive, and ran on rails and was therefore almost impossible to steer."
Indeed! I'm up to Hogfather right now, and he's a great part of this one, just by being himself.
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