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Smallville: Bulletproof

"Rain check on girls' night?"

No, Clark! Don't go back to Lana! We just got rid of her after seven long years! DON'T GO BACK TO LANA, CLARK!


There were a few good moments, but nothing truly memorable about this episode. It's always nice to see Clark work with Oliver, even unintentionally, and at least we saw Clark put on a uniform and go out to fight crime. Actually, this episode was pretty much a superhero-bonding lesson. Cops aren't bulletproof. They need backup. So do superheroes. Got it. But wait. Clark is bulletproof, so this entire episode is meaningless. Okay, moving right along.

Lois continued to be distressingly absent, and it was like Lana never left. Lana and Tess trading sophisticated power bon mots was a massive yawn; the tantalizing tidbits about Lex were the best part. I did like the revelation that Lex bugged Tess's optic nerve; that was wonderfully supervillainy. And I liked the scene where Tess jammed Lex's signal, and cried. Another of Lex's lovers realizes the truth. Another instance of serious love-to-hatred turning.

But all it did was make me miss Lex all the more. And Lois. And it would have been nice to see more of Martian Man Hunter. I like Martian Man Hunter. The poor guy has a no-more-superpowers hangover; it would be nice if he got them back.

Bits and pieces:

— How convenient that Clark was in the hospital when Jones' ambulance showed up. And as far as Clark masquerading as a cop goes, wouldn't his lack of training be obvious in, like, five minutes?

— "Prometheus," whatever it is, is Lex's one chance at survival. Okay.

— Emil, the ER doctor who was Oliver's "specialist on the payroll," was played by Battlestar Galactica's Alessandro Juliani. Sam Witwer, who plays Davis, is also a BSG alumnus. Tahmoh Penniket, Aaron Douglas... there have been so many BSG cast guesting on Smallville that I've lost count.


Clark: "Lois. Lois is sooo..."
Chloe: "Lois?"

Clark: "Who are you? Warrior Angel?"
Kid: "No, I'm the Red Blue Blur."

Cop: "Meanwhile, we got these costumed idiots running around, taking all the credit. Green Arrow, Red Blue Blur..."

Tess: "And I thought we were bonding."
Lana: "Rain check on girls' night?"

Color me unimpressed. Two out of four stars,

Billie Doux had a love-hate relationship with Smallville, which is why some of her reviews are briefer than they should be.


  1. I'm with you. The only saving grace for this episode was the scene where Chloe called Clark on whatever it is that is going on between Lois and him. I love the fact that she can get in his face like that and get away with it.

  2. lois and lana both had hair changes this season, lois's got darker and lana's got curly. from a wide shot they look excruciatingly similar. this show really likes to push your buttons to the absolute limit!


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