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About Us: Paul Kelly

I’m honored to announce the fourth installment of our About Us Interview series. This week, we’ll learn all about Paul Kelly, the man who brought us the video of Henri the Cat.

Paul reviews Being Human, Doctor Who, Misfits and Sherlock. And if this isn’t enough for you, more about Paul can be found here.

1. What area of the world do you live in, and what do you do? (Because we all know you don't make any money doing this.)

Yorkshire, England -- home of explorer James Cook, the Yorkshire Pudding, and Geoff Boycott. Currently (and for the foreseeable future, I hope) I work as a music teacher and freelance scribbler.

2. If we just handed you a million pounds (you never know), what would you spend it on?

I'd buy a million lottery tickets and hope one of them won me the million pounds jackpot.

3. What random skill would our readers be surprised to know you have?

I can juggle. I can also throw a boomerang and have it come back. The boomerang is the real bane of my existence. I love it, yet it absolutely detests me. I've dislocated a finger, cut my face (several times), bruised my Adam's apple, and once hit myself in the eye with such force my pupil turned into a slit.

3(b). So why don't you stop, you idiot?

Gee, Mom... way to kill my buzz! I have stopped. Following the eye incident, I retired my boomerang to the shed... where it now sits, looking at me longingly. As a result of my dabblings, my shoulder now grinds every time I rotate my arm. I not sure my body is suited to throwing and catching things repeatedly.

4. Are you a dog person or a cat person, or is there another animal involved?

This is a question only a cat or dog person would ask. I don't think I'm either. I like both equally, and -- if I didn't have mild allergies to both -- I'd probably have one of each.

Luckily, I have several cat people living around me, so I'm surrounded by the furry little scoundrels... digging up my herbs, yowling at three in the morning, and sticking their faces in my eye socket when I'm trying to read. So I get to have the 'cat experience', and then when the sneezing starts, I get to kick their furry arses out the door. Which is ideal because (a) it cost me nothing, and (b) I don't have to clean up the poo. (Apart from the odd 'deposit' that gets left in the garden -- but that gets flicked over the fence in the dead of night, so even that has a fun element to it... especially when it hits washing.)

5. Of all the shows we don't cover, list your: (1) guilty pleasure, (2) favorite reality show, and (3) favorite from childhood.

(1) I'm quite partial to the adventures of Benedictine monk, Cadfael, and I love Northern Exposure (Maggie O'Connell, in particular). Which isn't particularly embarrassing, but my reason for liking it (Janine Turner) is a little weak.

(2) I only watch two -- Ice Road Truckers and Dancing on Ice. Oddly enough, both feature ice. Even stranger, Vanilla Ice was on the last season of Dancing on Ice. (On a subconscious level, I think I wildly applauded the coincidence.) Imagine what would happen if Vanilla Ice got his own Indonesian Ice Cream making show and called it Ice Ice Bali. I'd probably explode.

(3) Blake's 7, Doctor Who and The Hammer House of Horror.

5(b). What show would you recommend everyone finally get around to watching this summer?

Nikita. If you dropped it half way through the first season, now is the time to pick it up again. (It's just littering otherwise.) Also Awake. Love it or hate it, the finale was amazing (ly weird).

6. Fill in the blanks: If ___ weren't already reviewing ___, I'd want to do it.

If I weren't already reviewing my decision to punch Peter Kay in the neck for being in Doctor Who, I'd want to do it.

7. What's your favorite television show of all time? (Okay, top five will do if you can't narrow it down to one.)

In no particular order: Lost, Battlestar Galactica (reimagined version), Alias, Babylon 5 and Firefly.

8. You are hosting a dinner party for 8 TV characters and/or actors. Who would you invite?

My first instinct is to say Julie Benz, Charisma Carpenter, Lucy Lawless, Jamie Murray, Bar Refaeli (she played a sushi waitress in... that film I've forgotten the name of), Jennifer Garner, Maggie Q -- and then bring in Steven S. DeKnight as an eighth (to script the party) and let Spartacus style sexy times ensue. Of course, on reflection, that's a shallow answer, so let's forget I ever mentioned it.

Realistically, I'd probably invite Joss Whedon, James Cameron, Steven Soderbergh. Ridley Scott, Eric Kripke, JJ Abrams and Ryan Murphy – and then hound them mercilessly with questions about their least successful projects. Oh, and I'd have Jaime Murray as an eighth. Someone needs to feed me grapes.

9. Windows or Mac?

Neither. I use Linux. I simply refuse to pay for anything... even medical treatment. And that's why I live in England... and why I'm ill most of the time.

10. Which character do you identify with the most?

I can sometimes identify with how a character handles a particular situation, but no fictional character ever feels very much like me. (Save perhaps Beaker from The Muppets.) Which means I'm either totally unique (in a good way), or so absolutely unremarkable that basing a character on me would be professional suicide. Plus, if I identified with a character too deeply, I probably wouldn't watch the show. Imagine a show where the main protagonist throws cat poo over a fence with his boomerang-weakened shoulder, and then plays The Liquid Tension Experiment’s 'Acid Rain' on his nylon strung three-quarter classical. Worst show ever!

Or is it?

Next week: ChrisB!


  1. Great answers, Paul! I've got this great mental image of a "protagonist [who] throws cat poo over a fence with his boomerang-weakened shoulder, and then plays The Liquid Tension Experiment’s 'Acid Rain' on his nylon strung three-quarter classical." I think you've got a hit on your hands!

  2. I've never known anyone with a fascinating boomerang story before. :) What a fun read, Paul. Loved your portrait, too.

  3. LOL

    I ADORE BEAKER; you've made my day.

    There is a question up there : hey !!! it's from me ! Hee haw

    My sister left Canada and now lives in Whales; what a small world.

    After consideration, you should make BOTH suppers. On yes.

  4. HAHAHA Awesome interview!
    I'd really like to ask JJ about six degrees and what the hell he was thinking.

    Also: Battlestar Galactica FTW!!!

  5. You can juggle? Why am I only finding this out now? How could you keep something like that a secret? It's like I don't know you at all, man.

  6. Oh, Mark... we have to have some secrets between us.

  7. Boomerang? wow!

    I suddenly feel sorry for your neighbours' laundry! :p


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