"I Woke Up and One of Us Was Crying."
Regarding Neil Gaiman.
I first encountered the Harry Potter books when I was 28 years old. I enjoyed them and they meant a lot to me, but they weren’t in any way part of my formative years. And so, when Joanne Rowling openly dedicated herself to hatred and causing as much harm to Trans people as she can simply for their sin of existing, it made me angry but didn’t cut to the core of my identity as a human being. That said, I can’t enjoy anything related to Harry Potter anymore.
I first encountered Buffy the Vampire Slayer when I was 30. I loved the show (and its spinoff Angel) very much, and they meant a great deal to me. But then Joss Whedon’s personal actions came to light, and I just couldn’t enjoy his work anymore without feeling tainted. I’ve very recently started trying to rewatch Buffy and the results have been... mixed. But, again, I came to his work as an adult. They aren’t part of my formative years. They aren’t tightly bound up with who I am as a person.
The first issue of Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman came out at the beginning of my junior year of high school. I picked up issue #1 at the comic shop because I’d seen an ad for it that really grabbed me, and I was hooked from the first page. From then through March of 1996, I was a devoted reader of the book. It quite literally got me through college. It’s not an exaggeration to say that the reason I write today is because of Neil Gaiman.
The impact that Neil Gaiman’s Sandman and Grant Morrison’s Doom Patrol had on me both as a writer and as a human being can’t be overstated. They feature in my Master’s thesis project heavily. They’re inextricably bound up with who I am as a writer and as a human being.
If you’re unaware, Vulture has just published a lengthy piece detailing the accusations against Neil Gaiman. It’s bad. I could only get through about half of it before I had to stop reading. I’ll post a link in the comments to it if you want to read it for yourself, but I’d offer extreme caution to anyone with any sort of trauma in their past.
Right now, I feel like a part of my soul has been poisoned. And I get that that’s a melodramatic way to react to plausible allegations made against someone I’ve never actually met, but it’s still valid. His work is such a huge part of my life, and now I don’t know how to feel about it.
Typically, this is the point where we start talking about divorcing the art from the artist, and I just don’t have the energy for that.
The Sandman season two is going to drop on Netflix sometime this year. And thanks to Neil Gaiman’s past actions, I can’t imagine a world in which we’re going to get a third season, which makes me sad, and angry, and ashamed that that’s what I’m upset about when there are actual, legitimate victims of his actions out there in the world.
Currently I’m planning on reviewing the second season of Sandman. I’m planning to post a disclaimer at the start of each review linking back to this post, so that we can keep the discussion open.
My hope is that this can be a place where we can share our responses and feelings about the situation. Just typing this out has actually helped me a little bit, and I hope that it can help others in the same way. I would ask that we not rehash the specifics of the accusations in the comments below, for the sake of those of us with trauma in their past who don’t need to be subjected to it. The Vulture article is out there for anyone who wants to discuss the specifics.
One of my heroes is a monster. If he was one of yours as well, know that that doesn’t reflect on you.
-Mikey
For the purposes of this article, we should be clear that currently no charges have been filed against Neil Gaiman, and that currently the allegations against him are alleged and not proven. That said, it becomes clearer and clearer as more facts arise that those allegations are credible and – in my reasoned opinion – likely true. I take no pleasure in coming to that conclusion.
Here's the article in question.
ReplyDeletehttps://www.vulture.com/article/neil-gaiman-allegations-controversy-amanda-palmer-sandman-madoc.html
Again, I strongly caution you before you read it.
I'm not going to read the article. I've seen enough reactions to it to know how bad it must be. I don't even know what to say anymore. It feels like everyone ends up being so horrible. I have no heroes left. Why do people suck so much?
ReplyDeleteI also am not going to read the article, but like sunbunny, I've seen a lot of reactions and it's... Tiring. I remember having a cautious reaction to the allegations that came out over the summer because of the sketchy reputation of the publication/people who broke the story, but this is... yeah. Innocent until proven guilty and all but... I don't know. It sucks. A lot. And I hate how numb I'm becoming to stuff like this.
ReplyDeleteDivorcing the art from the artist is a lot easier when the artist lived 100 years ago, that's for sure.
My first encounter with his work was when he teamed with my favorite author of all time, Terry Pratchett (R.I.P.), whose Discworld novels are among the best books I've ever read. It was a great book, but I neve pursued his work further.
ReplyDeleteI have heard of these allegations and I have to believe there is truth to them. And it's so dang depressing when someone you like/love/look up to does horrible things like this.
For me it's Bill Cosby. I loved Fat Albert growing up. I believe that show is one reason I dislike racism so much, I grew up seeing people of different colors and ethnicities being kindred instead of 'other'. Then we find he's a monster, and that was a disgusting revelation that ruins my nostalgia for a show that I still feel was genuinely good.
My paternal grandpa has been gone for over a decade now, but he was a huge fan of Rolf Harris, and I used to listen to his albums with his silly songs and fun antics as a child, and then look what happened with him, another monster. In a way, I'm glad grandpa didn't live to see how awful the man was.
There's also H.P. Lovecraft of course. I enjoy many of his writings but loathe his stances on almost everything else. In his case though, he's been gone for a long time as Fangirl points out.
I don’t know that I have anything else to say but I’m right there with you. It’s a gut punch and yet I feel guilty for even being sad on my own behalf for losing art I loved when there are people who have directly suffered so much worse.
ReplyDeleteMy first experience with something like this was with Marion Zimmer Bradley, whose book 'The Mists Of Avalon' finally, finally helped me break out of the YA genre at a young age and bully myself into expanding. Into historical fantasy specifically at first but even when I couldn't find anything that touched me the same way I went into sci-fi and that finally solidified into a hobby I could be proud of myself for cultivating of my own accord. I don't mean to diminish the serious damage caused by JK Rowling's shenanigans and brain rot but I had such a muted response to that after the Marion stuff came out.
ReplyDeleteThese latest allegations about Gaiman brought me firmly back to that intense reaction I had with her. Just even a lot of the stray, surface level shittiness from him impacted me as badly as the truly severe stuff. Sandman comics was a HUGE deal for me. I'm younger than this article's writer but I also found it at a younger age and it really, basically, blew my mind up and expanded it creatively, and helped me sort of bridge a permanent connection to my subcon that doesn't feel weird and cringe (well, most of the time)... donating my whole collection of the comics felt like honor-killing an imaginary friend, to use an ugly metaphor. But I know I won't regret it, there is no scenario where I can separate this art from this artist.
Coraline is going to be awkward though, and maybe there's room for debate there, because though I'm a huge fan and I think it's an excellent work, I don't feel a "helped with my personal growth" -level connection to it, and I'm mostly talking about the movie which is a group project. I could buy how someone like him - unveiled - could still write Coraline, but Sandman... that stuff was BEAUTIFUL, transcendent, all that deep stuff, with soft eyes, and it broke my brain to find out this monster came up with that.
I'll probably be harboring new prejudices now, about writers who have ANY small interest in the occult and who are involved with Scientology in any capacity. I remember trying to convince myself actually that this whole "fabricated" scandal is from him pissing them off in some way, lol... yeah... but even if the convictions don't land, I'll count it as a failure of the justice system, not proof of his innocence.
Well wishes to anyone who was straight-up triggered by the allegations, I don't want to imagine how much worse this could feel for fans.
I am a simple person and not the deepest of thinkers but I saw a quote once for situations like this that has helped me greatly. The most beautiful of roses can grow out of the biggest piles of sh@!t. I cling to this thought every time I find out yet another creator is a pile of sh!$t.
ReplyDelete