by Mark Greig
‘Hail, Hale’ did everything a good penultimate episode should do; the stakes were raised, secrets were revealed, characters were placed in peril, and the Morrigan looked devilishly fabulous. Was it perfect? Not by a long shot. Was I still left hungry for more? You betcha.
Even though there is still one more episode to go, I feel confident in saying that season 3 has been an improvement over season 2. It has not been without its ups and downs. This season has been pretty erratic when it comes to story arcs. The writers just seem incapable of selecting one and sticking to it. First we had evil Bo, then there was all that Dawning malarkey, followed by the mystery of Bo's father and the Wanderer, and now Professor McCreepy’s Initiative for Fae. Although it made for a fun episode, this arc feels like it was made up last minute so they could have something for the finale. Besides Professor McCreepy pestering Lauren, there’s been no real built up, and the way the murder of the blonde Fae Bo fed on was worked in felt like a complete retcon.
It now looks less likely that Professor McCreepy is actually Bo's father or the Wanderer (I’m currently working on the theory that they are two different people). He is just a plain old human who wants to use the awesome power of science (and a makeshift fight club)to jump a few steps up the evolutionary ladder. You’d think with all the resources he clearly has at his disposal (soldiers, scientist, labs, a glass prison, a freakin’ fighting arena), he could at least afford a decent industrial oven so he wouldn’t have to dump bodies in a mass grave. Dude, super-villains can’t be thrifty with their gas bills. If you’re going to manically laugh like one, at least be willing to splash out like one.
Because of Professor McCreepy’s actions, the Fae elders were all worked up and worried, which the Morrigan has exploited to derail Hale’s inauguration as the new Ash. Hale is no one’s fool, but the Morrigan has been playing this game a lot longer and she knows how to manipulate the mob. I really like the dynamic between these two and wish we could’ve seen more of it this season. I have a lot of issues with the way the writers have handled Hale this season. Before last week, he’d been MIA since he Michael Corleone'd Kenzi way back in 'Fae-ed to Black'. That was six episodes ago, almost half the season. We saw more of Lochlan when he was the Ash and he wasn't even a series regular. That is just unacceptable. More Hale next season, please. Maybe as Kenzi's boyfriend? Come on, throw the shippers a bone.
All season Kenzi has been questioning her place in Team Succubus. Part of her is tired of being the human sidekick everyone tells to run and hide. She wants to contribute more to Bo than general Kenzi awesomeness. Was shifty druid guy being sincere when he said he could make Kenzi a Fae, or was it all just part of his ploy to get that kiss out of her? And why does Tamsin need that kiss? I thought all she needed was the hairs to make that potion work. Did I miss something? Whether he is being honest or not, Kenzi is clearly tempted. I hope she doesn’t give in to temptation and tells creepy guy to get stuffed. Offers like this always come with a catch.
Things aren’t looking good for my favourite Valkyrie at the moment. Besides all the guilt she’s feeling about serving Bo up for the Wanderer (which has caused her to switch to a strict liquid diet), she now has a bullet in her gut and it is just ruining her shirt. Since it is season finale time (and she’s only a recurring character) I have to wonder; is this the end for our Tammy? I hope not. Tamsin has been my favourite part of this season and losing her would be a real blow. It is always tricky introducing a new actor to an established ensemble, but Rachel Skarsten has fit in so well you’d be forgiven for thinking that she’d always been here.
Notes and Quotes
--Now finally we know what happened to Aoife. And Jimmy Hoffa.
--If I was running this show I would’ve called this episode ‘The Fae Who Would Be King’. That is a much better pun based title.
--So who grabbed Trick? I’m betting it was the Fae library because he still hadn’t paid all those overdue book fees.
--I love how Tamsin kept playing with the toilet chain during the bathtub scene. Rachel Skarsten’s acting throughout that scene was just terrific. Gold acting star for sure.
--Jerry the bartender was played by Seth Cooperman, Anna Silk's husband. I wonder if it was her idea to repeatedly right hook him.
--It has been hinted at before, but this episode made it painfully clear that Tamsin has fallen for Bo and fallen for her hard. I can’t be the only one who expected their bathtub encounter to go a farther than boobs on knees. Bo certainly did. She was definitely going in for a kiss as Tamsin was getting out of the tub.
--Does Tamsin really live in her truck? No wonder she's helping herself to Lauren's empty apartment (which I chose to consider adorable, rather than stalker creepy).
--How was that fall enough to knock Kenzi out?
--Tamsin has the tools and skills to remove a tire clamp. She is officially my new god.
--Did no one tell Bo that you don’t bring a knife to a gunfight?
Tamsin: "Bitch, this better not be your Lauren."
Kenzi: “Tell me your name isn’t Dickface, King of the Douchebags, is it?”
Hale: "If we're going to work together I need you to be less All About Eve, more Steel Magnolias. You feel me?"
The Morrigan: "Which one was about the haircut that gives you cancer?"
Hale: “God damn it Kenzi! You are not my friend! You’ve never been just a friend! If anything happens to you I won’t be any good to anyone, and right now I need to be better than I’ve ever been.”
Bo: “I'm alright, but I’m not perfect.”
Tamsin: “Yes you are. To me you are. Your eyes are both brown and blue.
Bo: "Tamsin, what are you doing?"
Tamsin: "Yes you are. To me you are. Your heart is both strong and gentle. You’re virtuous. And you’re a succubus. You shouldn’t be..."
Bo: "Be what?"
Tamsin: "Be real. Be here.”
Apologies for the lateness of this review. Real life matters got in the way. Three out of four boobs on knees.
Mark Greig has been writing for Doux Reviews since 2011. More Mark Greig.