I was sort of hoping there'd be a Hellmouth. And voila.
I have to admit that the supernatural plotting on this show isn't doing much for me. I'll even admit that I'm having a hard time retaining some of it because it's so freaking dense, and I'm definitely not ready to rewatch each episode and obsess about it. But there's an apocalypse coming, right? Crane and Abbie are the two witnesses in Revelations, right? And we just learned that Moloch is the Big Bad, I got that part. We also seem to have acquired Revolutionary-era Nazis in the form of supernatural Hessians who torture innocent bartenders to death, and one of them was even undercover as a music teacher.
We also have a magic sextant. You gotta love a magic sextant. Okay, so it was a secret map, not magic, but everything else on this show is supernatural. Like the box that was a doorway to the seventh circle of Hell. The scene in the church with the bubbling cauldron and the demons reminded me so much of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, the library and the Hellmouth, but with better special effects. Although the demons did look a bit like a bunch of kids writhing under a sheet.
I like both of the Mills sisters and it was nice to see Abbie and Jenny reconnect and move toward forgiveness. It was a little surprising to learn that Jenny also had a relationship with Sheriff Corbin, to the point where he entrusted her with his magic sextant. I also liked Abbie threatening Jenny's terrible former foster mother with brimstone.
But for me, the best part of this episode was at the beginning:
Crane: (sitting alone in a car) "... until fate's cruel hand intervened and in a blink of an eye, Katrina was lost to me."
Woman's voice: "I am so, so sorry!"
Crane: "I offer this tale, no matter how cruelly he may have treated you, to suggest that you do not give up nor give in to anything less than certainty in matters of the heart."
Woman's voice: (heartfelt) "No one's ever said it like that. Thank you."
Crane: "It is I who should thank you, kind woman, for unlocking this vehicle from afar. And showing me how the entertainment system operates. Farewell, Yolanda."
Woman's voice: "Thank you for calling Northstar Assistance."
It was funny and cute and a good "man out of time" scene, but it was more than that. It made me go "awww" because it was charming and sweet and a lovely character moment. How like Crane to share his heartbreak with a stranger in the hope that it would help her with her own.
And I loved Crane and his photographic memory remembering the map. And Crane invented the Boston Tea Party! Of course he did. I love this guy. I'm watching because of this guy. And I'll stop raving about Tom Mison now.
Bits and pieces:
-- The credits are too Beetlejuice for me. Am I the only one?
-- Did we already see "Keep telling yourself that" scrawled on the toilet paper dispenser at the truck stop?
-- Moloch was also mentioned on Buffy; he was the villain in... was it "I Robot, You Jane"?
-- The actresses who play Abbie and Jenny are both beautiful, but they don't much resemble each other.
-- I absolutely hate it when someone slices their hand deliberately to use the blood for a ritual. There are so many nerve endings in the hand, people use their hands constantly, and it would make a lot more sense to cut, say, anything else that isn't your freaking hand.
-- In this week's hair report, I just keep noticing that Crane and Abbie have the same hairdo. Maybe it's a "two witnesses" fashion thing.
Crane: "An officer of the law with a criminal past. Imagine the delinquency we could perpetrate if we really put our minds to it."
I like that Abbie isn't a goodie two shoes. And that Crane likes that Abbie isn't a goodie two shoes.
Abbie: "You invented the Boston Tea Party so that you could steal something from the British?"
Crane: "At the time, it was referred to as 'The destruction of the tea'. You've coined a far more festive name."
Well, it used to be a festive name, before it became a political group hellbent on taking us back to the 18th century and destroying the country's economy. Which sort of fits in with the apocalypse on this show, doesn't it?
I'm not ready to commit to reviewing this show every week, but I am still getting a charge out of it. What did you all think?
Billie Doux is the founder of Doux Reviews and has been reviewing her favorite shows for quite some time. More Billie Doux.
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