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True Blood: Bad Blood

Arlene: "I'm sorry you fell in love with a serial killer, all right? But honestly, who here hasn't?"

Definitely fast-moving and fun to watch, and I wasn't bored for a moment. In fact, there was so much going on that I almost couldn't track it. Maybe I should watch the episode a few more times, paying close attention to a couple of scenes in particular. Was there a lot of male nudity in this episode, or what?

Seriously (or comedically, if you prefer) I'm all for non-stop action (and male nudity), but I hope the entire season isn't this chaotic.

This episode was basically a ton of season three set-up. Tara is seriously suicidal. Arlene is pregnant, which is never good when you've been blacking out at orgies. Jessica played with her food and wound up a murderer. Andy and Jason were busily and rather stupidly covering up what happened to Eggs. (What a homicidal group of characters we have.) How long will Jason be able to keep his mouth shut about Eggs? He can't keep his mouth shut about anything.

And Eric was naked. I may have mentioned that already.

I was surprised that Bill was taken by drainers, not Lorena. And he's already gotten himself loose. He's not out of the woods yet, though, so to speak, since there appear to be werewolves in Mississippi. What was Eric planning to do with Bill? Were his intentions violent, or was he just planning to talk to Bill about the situation with the Queen? Who is seriously broke, and probably about to get Eric into huge trouble with the Magister. I bet the Queen would throw Eric under the bus in a heartbeat, if she had one. (Either a bus or a heartbeat.) How much power does the Magister have? Is the Queen subject to his justice? Would Eric throw the Queen under the bus? Of course he would.

The blood exchange sex dreams might be a big season three theme. I have to admit that Sam's sex dream about Bill was pretty darned funny. ("I hear the water in Arkansas is... very hard.") How many male cast members did we see naked in this episode?

And speaking of Eric naked, the way he confronted Sookie mid-coitus and calmly carried on a conversation with her was so funny. How did she manage to keep her eyes on his face?

Bits and pieces:

-- The episode began at pretty much the moment it left off, just like last season. The cast is pretty much the same, with the subtraction of Mehcad Brooks (Eggs) and Michelle Forbes (Maryann), and addition of Kristin Bauer van Straten (Pam) and Marshall Allman (Tommy Mickens).

-- Several sources listed this episode's title as "Pack of Wolves." What's with that?

-- This is the second season opener in which Bill was attacked by drainers.

-- I didn't once think about the books. Good for you, Alan Ball. I don't want to think about the books. I want the books and the series to be two separate experiences.

-- Sookie hasn't had the chance yet to get the Maryann crap out of her house. Tara is clearly not equipped to help, what with the suicide attempt and hating Sookie and all.

-- Jason used the word "dogma" correctly in a sentence. That's not like Jason. Maybe it had something to do with canine psychology. Yes, I'm kidding.

-- If Pam wasn't just putting Lafayette on, she was once a lady of the evening.

-- The scene with Bill and the elderly Olivia was actually rather sweet.

-- In this season's hair report, Hoyt managed to get a haircut pretty quickly. Oddly enough, so did Eric, whose hair is even shorter this season than last.

-- Six hours of sex? Are you kidding me?

-- Forget vampires and werewolves. The real horror was Tara being held by her mother.


Andy: "Conscience off, dick on, and everything's gonna be all right."
Jason: "Fine."
Andy: "Say it with me. Conscience off."
Jason: "Conscience off."
Andy: "Dick what?
Jason: "Dick on."
Andy: "And everything's..."
Jason: "Gonna be all right."

Pam: "Now, I don't remember telling you that lavender was my favorite color."
Sookie: "I'm in no mood for lesbian weirdness tonight, Pam."

Pam: (obviously faking) "Sookie, stop. Don't. Come back." Loved this scene, really. I'm so glad we're going to get more of Pam.

Sam: "Remind me never to mess with the Magnolia Chamber of Commerce."

Lettie Mae: "I'm sorry about shooting your gun at you."
Lafayette: "Bitch, you, me, bridge, it ain't gonna muthafuckin happen."

Great fun, but not terribly cohesive. Three out of four naked guys,

Billie Doux loves good television and spends way too much time writing about it.


  1. Billie, I think that naked guys are the best rating system I've seen yet. Oh, how I love True Blood. The only disappointment was that we didn't actually see Sam's parents. That was the part I was looking forward to most. I like Sam. I do think I disagree slightly with one thing: Bill/Olivia stuff really creeped me out. I get that Bill didn't mean to harm her (much) and that he paid her, but I just couldn't help finding it gross. I think that is just me, though. Other than that, I just enjoyed the whole episode.

  2. Here we go again! Another TB season opens to a bunch of stories running. I was a bit... disappointed? about Bill and the drainers. It left me expecting something more interesting. Pam is always a plus. Eric, naked or not, is the best part of this show for me. Getting to know the wolves is going to be good, I think... And the rating system is great!

  3. Well the drainers had a werewolf tattoo on their necks and Bill was guessing they are draining him while they escort him to someoene. So i guess that was a kidnapping ordered by the werewolves that cornered him at the end.

    Watching it i realized i missed True Blood, i especially missed True Blood without Maryann. So much.

  4. I agree with you, Patryk, I think that the drainers and the werewolves are the same (there were four of them and Sookie only found one body, right?)

    Sam's dream was pretty hot and Eric naked... well, no words necessary :)

    Keep up the good work, Billie. Greeting from across the ocean :)

  5. Disjointed and all over the place, felt more like an extra long ‘Currently on True Blood’ recap than a proper episode but I don’t really care. We’re finally getting more Pam this season so I’m as happy as all the Alexander Skarsgard fans are right now.

    Oh, and the Bill/Sam scene has to be the funniest thing I've seen all year. Must’ve made all the slash fans heads explode.

  6. Wow, Sookie must have rubbed a little of her mind reading on Sam all this years. How else would he dream about Bill in the exact same position/situation our romantic vampire was in at the moment (half-naked, strained, lost, in need for food)

    But Pam was a hoot, and I like any episode where Lafayette has a good part.

    Hope the werewolf storyline isn't as dull as the ones form S02.

  7. As usual, great review Billie! Man, did I miss this show!

    At the rate things go in Bon Temps, soon everybody will have had Vampire blood and have sexy dreams with every vampire in town. Do V users also get sexy dreams with vampires they don't know? Jason had them when he did V didn't he?

    The Bill/Old Olivia scenes were sad and creepy and sweet all at once. But that was not my least favorite part of the episode. The scenes with the Queen were not what I expected. As magnificent as the Queen was in Season 2, she was so bratty in this episode, she bored me to tears.

    I'm just thrilled we'll get our fix of Pam this season. I hope we'll get enough Lafayette too...

  8. I too was underwhelmed by the queen, i really loved the character last season. I also agree that the episode was a bit underwhelming and I'm looking forward to when the writers get in to the swing of things.

  9. Six hours of sex with Eric! Boy, I'm almost jealous of the dancer. Who am I fooling? If Alexander Skarsgard was hotter my tv screen would melt. I loved Sam's dream, and how he thanked the Magnolia Chamber of Commerce girl for waking him up. So, werewolves, hu, why would they want Bill dead, or drained, or whatever? I hope the season doesn't go onto that Maryann insamnity again, and keep on having fab characters as the Queen and Pam more, as well as Lafayette, who has always been one of my favorite characters of the show. Oh, and how funny was it that the vet students begin to think Jason was a pervert killer? ahaha. Loved it, loved the barechests, and please, keep Eric naked a bit more... gooooooshhhhhhh. Loved the rating too!

  10. I liked the episode but we've had stronger opening ones.

    I got the feeling that the werewolves at the end of the episode were actually the same guys who kidnapped Bill at the start of the episode.

    Pam got some of the best lines in this one but why do I get the feeling that either her or Lafayette will be scapegoated with the V storyline?

    I actually hated Sophie-Anne in this episode and wanted Eric to stake her badly. Maybe she'll improve because I didn't mind her in Season 2 but here she was annoying.

    Lafayette is what Tara needs, not Lettie Mae. That woman is useless in every way.

    The Bill/Sam scene was interesting but I'm hoping that Sam's family aren't around for long. I just don't think I'll end up caring about any of them to be honest.

    More Jessica/Hoyt please. And Jason had me in stitches as well for some reason.

  11. I liked this opener a lot. I liked how it followed right away from season 2 finale. Pam and Jessica are amazing and they need to have more scenes. And Anna Paquin as Sookie is always great!

  12. A strong open to the season. Although it picks up right where season two ended, it felt as though we had moved forward significantly by the end.

    I am all for Eric being naked. And, Sookie looking anywhere but down was hilarious. However, the scene itself felt a bit too close to rape for my comfort. I want to root for Eric/Sookie, but he needs to stop chaining women to walls in order to have sex with them.

    Werewolves? They should add something interesting to the mix.


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