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True Blood: You're No Good

Sookie: "You're not God, Bill. You're just an asshole."

How cute was that Eric-and-Willa-in-a-kingsize-coffin scene, with the finger-sucking and all?

Maybe I don't want Eric with Sookie after all. Maybe I just want a whole lot of Eric. And his semi-disobedient progeny, and Jessica. They're without a doubt the best part of the series these days, and probably ever. I'm glad Eric didn't kill Willa. He doesn't have the best track record with things like that. (I'm talking about you, Talbot.)

The whole transparent Nazi metaphor continued. Now we have vampire death camps, which is where Bill's precog "cylinder of death" must be. Apparently, Bill does still care about his peeps (or at the very least, Jessica). Maybe Lillith loved all of her vampire subjects, although she did seem a bit careless about setting them against each other.

Bill bursting into flames did have its comical aspects. He does have limitations. Maybe next time he'll listen to Jessica. I was never a big fan of Bill, and I don't know how I feel about him any more, so maybe he should go stand in the sunlight. But if he saves all of my favorite vampires from a horrible flamey death, though, I might like him again. A little. Synthesizing a new formula of Tru Blood from Andy's fairy halflings, though? At least, seeing Jessica as an uber sexy undercover coed was pretty funny.

While the vampires are the highlight of this show for me, I am liking Niall more with each episode. Loved his cool speedy thing and his CSI hands. But Ben the halfling? Not so much. Sookie can "feel" Ben listening to her mind, which feels like a huge romantic turnoff to me (wasn't that why Sookie was originally attracted to vampires in the first place, a huge plot point in the series?) but the writers are apparently pushing the Sookie/Ben thing pretty darned hard, anyway. Sorry, but it's just never ever going to work for me. Don't the writers know what True Blood fans really want? Seriously?

I've noticed how my comments about shifters and werewolves always seem to fall to the bottom of my review. (For me, it's all about the vampires.) Nicole seems to be warm for Sam, and even though they have a tiny bit of chemistry, it doesn't feel right to me since Luna just died and I just don't trust Nicole's motives. The couple I did enjoy seeing this week was Sam and Lafayette together. That scene where Lafayette talked with Sam about their working relationship was just lovely.

It was obvious that Sam was the owl, but I still enjoyed the Emma-napping scene. The werewolves confronting the cops, though? Not so much. Maybe I was wrong about Emma belonging with her grandmother and the pack. Rikki was outright mean to Emma, and when did Alcide become such an asshole? I was never a big Alcide fan, but at least I used to like him. They'd better fix this. Taking off his clothes, while undeniably enjoyable for the audience, is not enough!

Still haven't actually seen Warlow the supervamp who can get into a fairy club somehow. Is it someone we know? Hey, what other all-powerful superfast vampire do we know? Okay, kidding, I know it's not Billith.

Bits and pieces:

-- Welcome back, Sarah Newlin! I'm suddenly worried that Steve will shortly be toast. That would be sad.

-- Andy's tween daughters still don't have names. (Why doesn't that surprise me?)

-- I was sad that we left Fangtasia forever. Maybe it isn't forever. But I loved seeing Ginger again. She is hilarious.

-- Jason's hallucinations and/or illness is a bit confusing. Hopefully, it will get a bit clearer as the season progresses. (If you understand exactly what's happening to him, feel free to enlighten me in the comments!)

-- Bill can't survive the sun, but he doesn't need invitations now. That's an inconsistent supergift you got there, Bill.

-- Fairies turn to dust in this 'verse, and vampires don't. That just feels unnatural for a fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer like me.

-- Andy still wants Holly. I think she's too good for him.

-- Steve and Sarah Newlin used to wear color-coordinated outfits. This time, she was all in red and black, and he was in black and covered with blood. Her hair was practically levitating, too. Which has nothing to do with the color coordination, but I thought it was fun.

-- I'm really not into the clothes so much, but can I say how much I love Niall's outfit? When you think about it, what would an ancient, powerful fairy king wear? That really could be it.


Sookie: "I take regular danger in stride. That way, I've still got a real healthy fear inside me for when the shit really hits the fan."

Eric: "It's just a bar, Pam."
Pam: "Not even you believe that."

Lafayette: "Before you turn into a snake or bear or some shit that I can't have a conversation with, what insane plan you got cooking in that pretty little head of yours?"

Ginger: "Does mean we're not fucking?"
Eric: "Sadly, Ginger, no, we will not be fucking on this occasion. However, the night will come when we do, I promise you."
It'd be fun to see that, and not in a prurient way. They're so funny together.

Jason: "The hallucinations are gone. I think."
Sookie: "You were hallucinating?"
Jason: "Like a motherfucker!"

Jason: "You didn't wonder why I was acting all crazy and more racist than usual?"

Andy: "Dammit, girls, how many times do I have to tell you? Hand lasers off!"

Sarah: "The truth is, if you really want to do God's work, you have to be in politics."

Eric: "It's okay, Ginger. I understand. You're stupid."

I did enjoy this one. What did y'all think?

Billie Doux loves good television and spends way too much time writing about it.


  1. I am going with Ben for Warlow. And why did Niall make the same mistake as Jason? Telling a stranger your story of life is a bad move. Even for a fairy king.

    I am a little bit surprised that you did not mention the "rape" scene. The arguements over that scene seem to be all over the place.

  2. Did I fall asleep during the episode? What rape scene?

  3. Oh, I get it. You mean what Eric did to Willa right before he kidnapped her. Eric was certainly treating Willa abominably, I agree, no argument there. I'm not sure why that didn't register so much with me. Because it was Eric? Because later she seemed to be very into him?

  4. I loved(!) the Steve/Sarah scene; it was probably the only thing I liked about this episode, apart from Andy's "Hand lasers OFF!" line. It just felt very stilted? I don't know, maybe that's why I shouldn't watch True Blood while battling the flu. Everything gets funky.

    Someone called Ben a "dollar store Dean Winchester" on Tumblr, and now that's all I see.

    The last faerie that Niall dusted was Claude, right? My live stream wasn't all that clear, but he sounded Claude-like.

  5. Dollar store Dean Winchester. That's perfect, Morgan.

  6. @ Morgan India: Yes, I'm afraid that was Claude. Aww, I liked the fairy club and I'm sad it's gone. Go, go, Sookie, supernova Warlow!

    For now I like the dark tone of this season. Feels like a real bad storm is coming. This will end bloody and ugly.

    Are there plans for Season 7?

  7. CyberYork, there hasn't been an announcement yet about season seven, but my friends at True-blood.net say there almost certainly will be at least one more season, and possibly two.

    I thought that was Claude, but I wasn't certain. Oh, well. Claude, we barely knew ye.

  8. If Ben isn't Warlow in disguise, he's got to be some other kind of evil person. He just seems a little too good to be true for doom-magnet Sookie Stackhouse. I do agree, it's a little awkward to shoehorn in love interests like Nicole and Ben immediately after Sam and Sookie got out of fairly substantial relationships.

    I can't say I feel sorry for what happened to the shifter activists. What were they expecting the WEREWOLVES to do? Historically, they don't have a reputation for friendliness. I did like Robert Patrick looking on and realizing how stupid everyone was acting in that scene.

    Still holding out hope for Alcide. He's clearly still trying to be heroic, but his hard ass, pro-wolf agenda isn't enough to keep his pack in line.

    Yeah, Team Northman is definitely the most interesting element this season; I too am gonna remember Eric's promise to Ginger, lol. It's funny, every character seems like they could have their own show, yet they don't really work unless their all together.

    Rutger Hauer as Niall is providing some cool fairy background, which is decent.

    Eric, Pam, and Jessica may be your deal breaker, but I honestly think Jason is mine. It's amazing how he started being one of the characters I loathed to the one I rooted for the most. I might be disappointed, since this episode really gave me the feeling that this is the season he dies.

    The same could be true for Jessica, since Bill is just getting more and more diabolical and I don't think she's gonna turn her back on him.

    Well, we'll see.

  9. Am I watching a different series from you people? Warlow has appeared in both of the last episodes just near the beginning. He appears on a bridge and is breaking out of some sort of mist. He is old with a long straggly black beard and bears no resemblance to anyone on the show. He could be Rutger Hauer made up.

  10. Interesting you mention the Nazi metaphor.

    Another theme of this year's season is gun controle this at least to Janina Gavankar who was on this week's TB afterbuzz aftershow on youtube.

  11. "Am I watching a different series from you people? Warlow has appeared in both of the last episodes just near the beginning."

    Are you sure? That guy we saw wasn't wearing a name tag. He could be anybody, and it wouldn't be the first ridiculously deceptive thing on this show.

    I feel certain that Ben or Niall is up to no good. I don't think either one of them is Warlow (unless the writers are cheating BIG TIME with the vampire rules) but I don't trust anything either one of them says. Something is definitely rotten here.

  12. I'm enjoying this series, but I want more scenes of Sookie and Eric (in whatever way, just on screen at the same time). Or Sookie and Tara for that matter - hopefully Tara's heading for Sookie's!

  13. I just want to say that Rutger is billed as Niall/Warlow on IMDB. Ought to say something

  14. I noticed that, Maaian. I also noticed that Jason thought he was Warlow, so that might be why. Maybe Hauer is playing both parts, too.


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