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The Originals: For the Next Millennium

"I am the thing that men fear."

I ended up deep in a Netflix binge as a result of not wanting to write this review. Que sera, sera. It was only the premiere.

Witches,

It might be time for Davina to take a leadership seminar. She's struggling to get the hang of this whole regent business. If I understand correctly, she just chats with all of the dead ancestors and relays their messages. Right? Then why are the covens so pissed? Do they think she is lying about the ancestral guidance as a vampire sympathizer? Are they secretly just mad at the ancestors, but need a living person to aim their frustrations at? Was it just Josh that made me like Davina so much and without him to balance her out I don't care about her story? Marcel had a point, though. When you run in a circle of people that can literally set you on fire with their words, you need to find a way to keep them in line. I do still love Davina and Marcel. At the end of the day, they truly care about the others' safety.

and Vampires,

Let's face it, the Mikaelsons are a hot mess. Even more so than usual. When the only sibling making sense is the one that was kidnapped and raised by an insane person, it might be time to re-evaluate your life choices, you guys. Klaus backsliding into eating the reviewer, that wasn't a fan of his art, after Cami called him a disappointment made me roll my eyes. I get it. Killing Mikael didn't magically get rid of his daddy issues, but can we stop beating this particular horse already? It's dead. It's really really dead. In fact, I felt that way about everything he did in this episode, from feeling no remorse about killing Gia and cursing Hayley to not respecting Cami's boundaries. At least Elijah made more sense to me. Of course he is keeping his promise to watch over Hope and bringing Hayley picnics when she can enjoy them. And thankfully he -FINALLY- isn't letting Klaus right off the hook. Is it wrong of me to hope that werewolf king what's-his-name was one of those dead wolves so Hayley and Elijah can start making eyes at each other guilt-free again?

I don't understand what, I assume, is going to be the main plot this season. The sire lines are fighting because... why? Turf war? Is this anything like college rivalries? Because those don't make sense to me either. While I'm harping, were all these vampires keeping track, all this time, of which line they belonged to? Because the more time that goes by and the more removed the vamp is from the originals in the whacky, blood-soaked family tree the less sense it makes. I'm picturing lots of awkward telephone calls after Finn and Kols lines died off. "Hey Gertrude. Long time, no talk. Haven't seen you since we ate that village 750 years ago. Soooo, weird question, who killed you? And do you know who killed him?" etc. etc.

Marcel has also started fight club in the old church.

P.S. Is anyone trying to bring Kol back anymore? And is Finn still locked in Freya's fancy blue necklace (that got its own close up)? It's gotta be cramped for room in there.

and Werewolves, oh my!

I don't know if I can even talk about Hayley. I feel so terrible for her, and the hits just keep on coming. Now she'll be hunted. Or she will when Davina decides to let her out of the weird circle she's been confined to. What is she thinking, forcing Hayley to spend her scant time in human form away from her daughter? Mean Davina, no biscuit. I'm beginning to think that she really shouldn't be leading anyone, Let alone multiple covens of uber powerful witches.

No rating this week. Mostly because I can't decide on what to rate it.

Bites and pieces

Rebekah, Kol and Finn are still in the mix via flashbacks. I guess Claire Holt's desperation to leave The Originals behind might have been a little exaggerated.

The Originals didn't immediately know they could compel people. Did they really not know or was it a skill that was acquired later?? Because the possibility of acquiring new skills could be fun!

Of course it was Rebekah that originally wanted to wear nice things and go to fancy castle parties.

Lucian's stationery says "King Maker." Klaus outright referred to himself as a king, too. No leaping required to make that connection. I smell a Lucian double-cross.

Why is Marcel so desperate for Davina to make him daylight rings? Are there not plenty of other witch sources that he could ask?

Also, there was the chick in the temple that killed a monk. Or something.

Am I being too harsh? Maybe I'm just bummed that Veronica Mars alum and new detective in town didn't get more screen time. Can't wait to see where that character goes.

3 comments:

  1. The "chick in the temple" is actually the first person who Rebekah turned back in ~1002AD. Also, possible fun fact: the actress, Rebecca Breeds, is married to Luke Mitchell from Agents of SHIELD.

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  2. I really love your reviews, Laure. Lol.

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  3. When the only sibling making sense is the one that was kidnapped and raised by an insane person, it might be time to re-evaluate your life choices, you guys. LOL. :) Yeah. Where does Freya get off being so well adjusted? I totally agree about Klaus killing the reviewer, even though it made me laugh a little.

    And you're so right about the sire line. Wasn't everyone in Mystic Falls wondering which Original was their sire awhile back? You'd assume that there are vampires all over the place that don't have a freaking clue what their sire line is.

    The flashbacks to a thousand years ago when all five of the Originals figured out how to pass as human was fun. Of course, it was because Rebekah wanted to wear something pretty instead of rags. (As you pointed out, Laure.) Let's go for the stereotypes, shall we?

    Enjoyed your review!

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