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Vampire Diaries: Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me

“So the mystery guest makes an appearance.”

A fake-out! A double-cross! Yet another party, and some (gasp!) tension between the Salvatore brothers. Must be Thursday.

Life—that’s Life with a capital L—intruded this week, and as I sat down to recall this week’s TVD, which I watched about 50 hours ago, my mind went immediately to the stand-out scene of the episode: Julian offering the Big Ring to Nora (or Mary Louise, whatever). He just happened to be wearing it. On his pinkie. And both he and Nora Louise thought it was a perfectly tasteful bauble. That is the most unbelievable thing I’ve ever seen.

And that’s coming from someone who watched the rest of the episode, which included Mama Salvatore coming full circle to sacrifice herself for her children. Lily has been so mercurial since we first met her that I never quite know when she’s being serious, when she’s being devious, what motivates her, or what the results will be. (I was perfectly willing to accept her sacrifice and her flashforward pursuit of Damon simultaneously, like a vampire soap-opera version of Orwellian doublethink.)

For the Heretics, the repercussions of Lily’s death will be enormous. The entity I think of as Nora Louise seems to have suddenly, after 133 years, broken up. The blond one is allied with Julian; the brunette one, Beau, and Valerie are allied with our heroes.

But that sentence doesn’t even work, since our group of heroes—the ragtag bunch of mostly-mystical misfits we’ve been following for seven years—is increasingly fractured. Caroline is, appropriately, preoccupied with being mystically pregnant with Alaric’s babies. Alaric and Bonnie were on hiatus. (I like to imagine them having adventures with notOscar.) Stefan and Damon have perpetual drama, and Matt has joined an anti-vampire Initiative.

That’s sad, and I wonder if the show knows that is happening. Perhaps it’s just an artifact of the focus on the Heretics and the vagaries of the exodus from Mystic Falls. Although that, too, continues to be a bit of a mystery moment: why evacuate Mystic Falls only to bring in a bunch of compelled people who can be new victims?

Asking that sort of question is like asking a three year-old to explain calculus, I suppose. TVD this year has been hit-or-miss, but it’s especially miss if you look at the oddness of the arc over the past eight episodes. Whereas this show used to be about rapidfire developments, it is now about tepid changes.

That’s all rather negative, but there were some highlights here. I like that TVD is letting Caroline work through her issues with the mystical pregnancy, and I’m curious to see where Stefan fits into that equation (especially given what we’ve seen of their non-relationship in the flashforwards). Ditto the support for Valerie and her miscarriage. Matt capturing Enzo is more funny than anything else: I’m glad Matt found something to do, but I feel bad that Enzo is back in captivity. Poor guy has remarkably bad luck. (Although he does get Bonnie down the line, so at some point his luck will radically change for the better.)

The flashforward was, of course, my favorite part. The idea of Lily as the vengeful pursuer was fascinating, and I was very surprised when we discovered that was just a werewolf-toxin fakeout. I still absolutely cannot figure out who the future pursuer is. Do you have any ideas?

Bites and Pieces:

• All the Heretics joked that Lily was boring. But didn’t she throw a party last week?

• Matt: “Want to cut class today?” They’re still attending classes?

• Caroline: “I guess there’s no right thing to say when your girlfriend is magically pregnant with another man’s babies.”

Two out of four really, really tasteful engagement rings.

Josie Kafka is a full-time cat servant and part-time rogue demon hunter. (What's a rogue demon?)


  1. For some reason, the whole Heretic thing hasn't been working for me, and I have never found Lily interesting. So I thought this episode was just a bit dull -- right up until Lily actually died. And I think she's staying dead! Wow.

    Poor Enzo. He's had way too much in the way of imprisonment, even if Matt does need something to do. :)

  2. I think the issue I'm having with VD at the moment -- apart from the terrible itching -- is that now Elena's gone, I feel like Caroline should be more central. Unfortunately, with Candice pregnant, they seems to have farmed the show out to a cast of unknowns. I don't think the show's any worse than last season story-wise, but I don't feel as invested in the characters. And you're dead right--having the gang so fragmented is a worry. The camaraderie between everyone has always been a strong selling point, but everyone's journal seems to know more these days than the characters themselves.

    I laughed at your ring comment. Personally, I was amazed that it was just the right size. What are the chances?


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