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Angel: Fredless

Fred: "Was there another massacre?"
Lorne: "Oh, no, just the one. But it turns out massacres are a lot like sitting through Godfather 3. Once is enough."

Wonderful fakeout with Fred's parents Roger and Trish. We were led to believe they were evil ("those old monsters hunted you down") when in fact they were... good parents. What a concept. I loved Trish the bus driver running over the bug, and Roger saying things like, "Don't be silly, Trish. It's just a severed head." Very likable characters.

Of course, I knew about half way through that Fred would figure out what the purple crystals were, save the day, and stay with the group, but even with the predictability element, this was still a really good episode. I like Fred. I like the way the group is reacting to Fred. I especially liked the ending where everyone was painting Fred's room together. Some nice bonding going on there.

The first five minutes of this episode alone were worth the price of admission. Cordelia doing Buffy and Wesley doing Angel ("Kiss me!" "Bite me!") had me on the floor.

Bits and pieces, but not severed heads:

— There aren't a lot of grown women who look good in pigtails. Amy Acker looked good in pigtails.

— Loved Fred's catapult-decapitator-toaster.

— Lorne was still mad at Gunn, which was understandable because his bar still looked like a war zone.

— I'd be interested in an episode about Wesley's parents. Maybe culminating in their lingering, terrible deaths.

Quotes: (and there were a lot of good ones)

Fred: "What time is it?"
Cordelia: "Six twenty four. And for those of you who are playing the home game, that's exactly three minutes from the last time you asked."

Wesley: "Oh, Buffy!"
Cordelia: "Yes, Angel?"
Wesley: "I love you so much, I almost forgot to brood."
Cordelia: "And just because I sent you to Hell that one time doesn't mean that we can't just be friends."
Wesley: "Or possibly more."
Cordelia: "Gasp! No! We mustn't."
Wesley: "Kiss me!"
Cordelia: "Bite me!"
Angel: "How about you both bite me?"

Fred: "But shouldn't we call Wesley first and maybe, you know, the army?"
Angel: "Nah. Durslar beasts are pretty Faulknerian. Lotta sound, no fury."

Wesley: "You know, back in my days as a rogue demon hunter, I once used that very spear to pin down what I thought was a small Rodentius demon. Of course, the poodle's owners weren't very happy."

Cordelia: "Ow, Fred! Ouch. I really wish she wouldn't leave her toys lying around."
Gunn: "Ooh. Pretty wicked looking toy."
Wesley: "I'll say. It almost looks like a spring-loaded decapitation device."
Cordelia: "Or it makes toast. With her, you never know."

Trish: "What kind of a place is this?"
Lorne: "Oh, do you like it? I was kind of going for a Dresden-after-the-bombing sort of feel."
Roger: "Ah, is this one of your big 'industry contacts?' Some guy in a bathrobe, wearing makeup and fake horns?"
Lorne: "They're not fake. And it's only a little eyeliner."
Wesley: "Lorne, I'd like you to meet Fred's parents, Mr. and Mrs. Burkle. They're here visiting from the country."
Roger: "Yeah. You have to forgive us hicks. Down in Texas, we don't get a lot of guys who wear eyeliner. Not for long, anyway."

Lorne: "Yeah, well, I'm not some mystical vending machine here to spit out answers every time you waltz in with a problem. I have a heart. Granted it's located in my left butt cheek, but it's still a heart."

Trish: "I wish he hadn't brought that thing out again. It gives me the willies."
Roger: "Oh, don't be silly, Trish. It's just a severed head."
Gunn: "I got it. The lady makes bug soup with a ten-ton bus, but show her a paper-mache head, she gets the willies. Ha. Women."
Angel: "Uh, Gunn, you do know it's not paper-mache?"
Gunn: "We still got that bleach in the bathroom?"

Roger: "Frankly, Angel, I don't care if you drink pig's blood, cow's blood, or those froofy little imported beers. You saved my little girl."

Angel: "So how you doing?"
Fred: "Oh, ah, fizzy. Kinda weird and... fizzy. But excited. And a little sad. Thankful. Sorta cautiously happy. Relieved and worried at the same time. Slightly nauseous while still being hopeful."
Angel: "And that about covers it."

Roger: "Hey, honey, would you look at this? Fred made this."
Gunn: "Cool, ain't it?"
Wesley: "We think it's some sort of mechanized weapon, possibly influenced by the medieval catapult, designed for serious to fatal wounding, if not complete decapitation."
Roger: "Or it makes toast."
Wesley: "Or it makes toast."

Three out of four, and I think this show is on a roll,

Billie Doux reviewed all of Buffy and Angel, so she knows the plural of apocalypse.


  1. This episode always makes me cry, especially when we realize that Fred’s parents are, as Gunn says, “parents” in all the wonderful meanings of that word.

  2. Crazy post-Pylea Fred was my favorite Fred, she was utterly charming and heartbreaking, that was when I fell in love with Amy Acker. :)

  3. As nice as the everyone-painting-Fred's-room scene at the end is, I preferred the earlier scene where they're all talking about Fred's parents as a better bonding example. Angel was posed with his hands clasped together under his chin in a cutely-sad/thoughtful way. Everyone needs parents.


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