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Smallville: Unsafe

Clark: "Mom, a girl would have to be crazy to get in a relationship with me."

I was surprised by how good this episode was, and how much I liked it. Especially, how much I liked Alicia.

It was very hard to tell throughout who the bad guy was: Alicia, or the twitchy doctor McBride. I even thought that when the bracelet came off, Alicia would revert to type and go homicidal. But no. By the end, I found myself wanting it to work out for Clark and Alicia, and couldn't completely blame her for dosing him with red K. Couldn't she at least have waited another few minutes before taking Clark's necklace off?

Sex was a general theme, and it wasn't just Clark and Alicia and her extreme honeymoon lingerie. Jason wanted more, and Lana was ready to comply. She had enough candles going in her apartment to burn the Talon down. But Clark and Lana both got to the end of the episode with their virtue intact. It's time, though. Heaven knows, the actors (especially Tom Welling) look older than their characters. Virginity just doesn't seem logical any more.

Lionel was back, and still going on about his higher purpose, which appeared to be helping others in need as well as saving Lex from himself. The Lionel/Lex scenes were an absolute hoot. We still don't know who got Lionel out of prison, though, or if he was sincere about his change. Lex certainly doesn't believe it. I find it hard to believe, too.

Bits and pieces:

— Loved the wedding ceremony in Vegas, the Elvis music, and the sleazy suite. And Clark and Alicia's aborted wedding night got very sexy. What fun.

— In keeping with our theme, we found out that Chloe was no longer pure. How hilarious that the culprit was Jimmy Olsen, who in the comic books never seemed like much of a lady killer to me.

— Clark left the lead bracelet in Alicia's hospital room. Just like leaving a wedding ring.

— The Kents were deeply unamused by Clark eloping to Vegas. Come on, Jonathan and Martha. Red K? Not his fault?

— John Glover looked particularly good in this episode. His hair was growing in, and he wasn't wearing orange any more.

— Jason confessed that he thought his mother arranged his meeting Lana in Paris.

— Alicia took a bullet to protect Clark's secret. But didn't Clark give it away by throwing Dr. McBride through the wall of the barn? (And one point.)


Alicia: "Good thing you've got buns of steel."

Lex: "The prodigal father returns."

Lionel: "Corporate maneuvering doesn't interest me any more."
Lex: "So, what, trying to kill me is going to be a full-time job?"
(I loved this one.)

Chloe: "His name was Jimmy. He was very cute in a bow-tie kind of way."

Alicia: "Can we just slow down a little? I want this to last forever."
Clark: "I'm not sure that's one of my abilities, but I'll do my best."

Four out of four stars,

Billie Doux had a love-hate relationship with Smallville, which is why some of her reviews are briefer than they should be.


  1. This one breaks my heart. Poor Clark. The BMOC thanks to his quarterbacking triumphs, he won't accept any of the not-so-subtle invitations thrown his way because he doesn't want to lie to anyone. What a good guy -- super, even.

    Re-enter Alicia, the cute girl who not only likes him, but knows his secret. Could it be possible? Of course not -- this is Smallville.

    I like the bookend scenes with Martha. The first one where he tells her that any girl would have to be crazy and then at the end where he cries because he was right -- she is crazy. That final scene kills me. I cry every time.

    But, you are right, Billie. The prolonged virginity thing is beginning to feel really, really forced. Even Chloe couldn't believe that Lana and Jason hadn't taken that step.

    Loving the "new" Lionel. I have no idea what his endgame is, which makes it all the more fun.

  2. I'm starting to Wonder whether this show was funded by christian fanatics---'marriage is sacred' indeed :facepalm:


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