Five Famous Movie Mentors (And how they died)

Like teenage girls home alone, cops just days away from retirement or anyone played by Sean Bean, wise old mentors to young movie heroes are just doomed to die. Here are five of the most well known and how they all met their ends.

Five Franchises That Didn't Know When to Quit

Someone once said that it is better to burn out than fade away. If only the producers in charge of these franchises had heeded that advice. So much pain and suffering could've been so easily avoided.

Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

“The time’s coming when you're gonna have to pick a side.”

Writing this review without major spoilers seems like a Herculean task. So let’s start with this. If you’re uninitiated in the Potterverse, you’re going to be very, very confused by this mess movie. If you’re a casual Potter fan, you might like this mess movie. I honestly don’t know what it’s like to be a casual Potter fan. If you’re like me, a diehard Potterhead who definitely owns a wand and, at last count, three Harry Potter scarves, prepare for disappointment. Or maybe you trust JK Rowling more than I do and trust that this mess movie is setting up bigger and better things or has been horribly misjudged. If so, I’d love to know what you think.

Five Fictional Schools You Wouldn't Want to Send Your Kids To

A few of the survivors of the graduating class of '99.

Despite what Pink Floyd might think, children really do need an education. They also need things like beating hearts, working lungs, and attached heads. And that is why you should never send your children to any of these educational death traps.

Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

I really struggled with this review. Mostly because of JK Rowling’s #KeeptheSecrets initiative, designed to keep people who want to see the play but haven’t away from spoilers. So, what I’ve decided is this. In keeping with #KeeptheSecrets, the first bit is very general and totally spoiler-free. Then comes the spoiler kitten. After that, anything goes. We good, JK?

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them felt like two very different movies stuck together. Spoiler free until you see the kitten!

News of Doux: April 6, 2014

This Week: A Call to Critics – A Manson for Mulder – A Couple of Casts – A Recap of Revenge – A Trilogy of Turmoil – The Humor of Hamsters