Reinventing Doux Reviews

Dear Readers,

After extensive consideration and much debate, Doux Reviews has decided to "doux" a rebrand. That's right: we're changing our site focus to something far more important than the actual content of TV shows.

We are now an all-fan, shipper-only site.

What does that mean? Instead of reviewing The Vampire Diaries, Josie Kafka will spend entire reviews shipping various unexpected pairings. Matt and Ghost Alaric? Call 'em Malaric and say hooray! Billie Doux will focus on dominating the Dean/Castiel shipwars. ChrisB will try to hook up Lady Mary Crowley with Kate Beckett from Castle. And Sunbunny---well, we all know how much she loves Bear, don't we? Can't wait to see where she goes with that!

In today's hard-hitting media climate, rebranding Doux Reviews into a shipper-only site seems the best way to stay on top of the market. From here on out, we will only post squees and giggles. No reviews. No news. Just semi-pornographic obsessions with pairing up various characters regardless of orientation, alive/dead status, or species. We will never again write essays, only listicles and occasional quizzes carefully engineered to help you find your inner shipper. And we will do it all with wild, frightening enthusiasm.

(Also, we hereby forbid any mention of cats. We are now a hamster fansite. It's the wave of the future.)

We welcome your feedback during this time of transition, although of course if you ship the wrong couple, we will call you terrible names and hate you forever.

(In unrelated but far more exciting news, our very own Ben P. Duck has some exciting new developments in the field of Bigfoot Studies to share here.)


Onanymous said...

Yay! Just what I always wanted.

I can't tell you how much this news warms my shippery heart on this special day.

sunbunny said...

"Just semi-pornographic obsessions with pairing up various characters"

…I see you've found my Tumblr.

Freeman said...

I support this change wholeheartedly. It's about time this site started focusing on the real issues. Why can't Arya Stark and Carl Grimes date? I don't see any reason why not. I mean, both shows have zombies in them don't they? Harold Finch and Chloe O'Brian? Match made in heaven if you ask me. And who could forget the perfect pairing of Don Draper and loyal secretary Felicity Smoak? The mere thought of them together melts my heart.

Look all I'm saying is that you guys are definitely making the right move here, and it doesn't undermine any of your efforts in the slightest. The only way is up from here on out.

Paul Kelly said...

Finally, the site has come of age. None of that waxing lyrical over plot development, or pondering the significance of a particular character decision. Now we can focus on what really matters: who should be doing whom. Personally, I shall be focussing on the inevitable coming together of Rory Williams and Mycroft Holmes (from now on to be known as MyWilli), and former Buffy actor, Anthony Stewart Head and Doctor Who companion, Donna Noble (AKA NobHead). There is no doubt in my mind that this is absolutely the way to go.

Emily Ecrivaine said...

"We welcome your feedback during this time of transition, although of course if you ship the wrong couple, we will call you terrible names and hate you forever."

Suddenly the entire Internet is summed up in one sentence...

Congratulations, Billie & Co! It is so good to see you all finally focusing on the important things in life. Plot threads and character development? Pfft! Who needs 'em? There are FAR more important things to focus on (like how Sir Gwaine is not-so-secretly in a relationship with his food) and it is good to see you all turn your considerable intellects and skills towards those vital, news-breaking ends.

I salute you!

mazephoenix said...

I look forward to many fun writings. Might I suggest shipping Katherine from Vampire Diaries and Kenzi from Lost Girl, known as KenzKat.
Or the fourth Doctors scarf/Tardis.
Many greetings of the day.

Scott Riggan said...

I'm disappointed to hear this. I was hoping you would be reviewing the new Netflix series "Sizzling Bacon.” It’s 20 minutes of … well, I probably shouldn’t spoil the surprise.

But I can’t help myself. [SPOILER ALERT] At one point a hand appears with a pair of tongs to flip the bacon … it could be Kevin Bacon, but we aren’t shown clearly. That’s one of the fascinating things about this show; there’s so much ambiguity and nuance. Which is why it will probably be cancelled soon.

How sad to know that the new editorial direction at Doux Reviews will preclude coverage of brave shows like this in favor of endless debates about whether Lady Edith and Daryl Dixon really belong together.

drnanamom said...

The comments are as funny as the post. Thanks for this Josie (sorry I don't have any clever pairings).